Starstruck

Colt walked to the doorway. "I'm going and making myself some breakfast sense you tend not to eat it."

"I'm sorry." She whispered.

"I'll be down stairs." He replied turning and walking back downstairs. He mixed up some cereal so it didn't smell and upset her stomach.

Journey layed on the floor, at least she hadn't gotten drunk and hurt him physically. She didn't know what to say, maybe she should just keep her mouth shut. She put her hair up and washed her face. The face wash was enough to make her stomach turn. She went back to the bedroom and changed clothes.

**blah**

Colt looked up when she walked downstairs and sat on a chair at the bar next to the kitchen.

"Can I ask you one thing?" he asked looking up at her. He still felt like he had been betrayed in more ways then one.

"What?" She asked tentitivly.

"Why?" He asked. "Why did you go in the first place and then get high, I really don't care what he has over you. I love you, nothin is gonna change that."

Journey didn't smile and she didn't frown. "You know what? I dont want to talk about it." she opened a carton of orange juice and got a cup to pour it in.
"Journey you lost your right not to talk about it last night." he said.
"My right?" she crossed her arms. "What are you trying to say?"
"I'm not TRYING to say anything, I'm SAYING you lost your right last night when you went off on your rampage."
Journey laughed, it was a bitterly cold laugh, but it was still a laugh.
"Well, you say that you'd still love me no matter what. But you know what? You wouldn't. Last night would be considered HEAVEN compared to things I've.... You know what? It doesn't even matter."



**I might have to go soon.**

"It doesn't matter!" He demanded. "It does matter, we can't have secerets between us, we can't do that when we plan on taking care of a baby together."

"Maybe we don't have to!" She growled.

"Oh, so you suggesting that we split up, huh?" He growled putting hte bowl in the sink.

"Maybe." Her voice was a little sofer.

"Fine, I'm going to the store, getting food for this place. You make up your mind what you want to do." He walked to the door and stopped turning and looking at her. "I don't want you to go, I love you, always will. But this is somethign you have to decide on your own."

Journey just stared, Colt stared back, possibly waiting for an answer.
"Fine." she said.
"Fine?" he asked.
"What do you want me to say? Fine." she said again. He stared at her for the longest time and then turned away, slamming the door. Journey closed her eyes tightly, she bit her lower lip, that had finally healed. Her hands were shaking as she pressed both of them against the counter and streched the muscles in her back. She let out a cry.

Colt stopped when he heard her cry out. He walked back into the house, 'You ok?" He asked softly.


**All i had**

**it's ok**
"I'm fine, can't you tell?" sarcastim dripped from her voice. "I'm just the happiest person in the world!" she stood up. "No I'm not OK!" she said.
"Well, God I was only asking. I just want to help-"
"Do not, help me." she said.

Colt sighed. "Fine." He turned and wlaked out of the house and to his truck driving to the store and then getting a bunch of food. he didn't know if she was staying or not. He hoped she would. He drove back to the house and then parked in the driveway taking a deep breath. He didn't know if he wanted to walk inside the house, didn't know if he wanted to know ifshe was in there or not. He wanted her in there so bad, but he couln't make her.

She had shut the bathroom door she leaned against the door, and finally when she no longer felt like standing she slid down, slowly. Maybe she was crazy, she wished she were crazy. She got into the shower, not taking any of her clothes off and sa down on the shower floor, she ran the water and let it pur all over, and when it was cold she didn't even notice. She had her back pressed against the wall and her hair was down. She turned hr legs to the possition where she could reach her heel with her hand. And some where in between she wasn't even sure she was crying or if it was just the water running over her.


*blah*

Colt finally got the guts to go inside. He carried the groceries inside and put them in the kitchen and pantry. He felt like being shot when he didn't see her anywhere.

"Damn it!" He growled slamming his hand into the counter. He hit his head over and over trying to think of where she would go so he could get her back!

Finally when she got back her common sense back she got out, soaking. She was still shaking. She realized she needed to start thinking about the baby instead of herself, and she wanted to break dowwn crying, she knew she should have never smoked that damn snow angel. She felt her jeans dripping, she eased her way out of them. She pulled her shirt over her head, leaving her tank top and hello-kitty underwear on. Her hair was dripping, she placed her hand over her stomach, she put in headphones and got out of the bathroom.

**my posts are really crappy today, sorry**

***That's fine***

Colt sighed, he needed a shower. He started up the stairs and stopped when he saw her.

"You stayed." He said softly. "Thank God!"

***All I had***

Journey saw him coming up the stairs. "Yeah." she nodded. "Look, I'm sorry, OK, I didn't want to hurt the baby. Hopefully, I didn't."
"Why did you do it?" he hugged her.
She closed her eyes. "I don't know, I just did it." she said. "I'm sorry, I just I really want the baby to have both parents." she said.

He nodded and hugged her. "Ok, I need a shower, i smell."

"No you don't." She laughed.

"I'll be out in a minute." He said kissing her softly.