One line Summary

What I do now: keep writing it and laugh at those immature enough to be offended.

If you could bathe in any substance, what would it be?

BUBBLEWRAP

What would you say if your friend started to turn into you, and the next day he/she was a replica of you?

(Badly worded, I know)

Dude, where's the nearest plastic surgeon?

What would you say if you had to work in a fast food resturant for the rest of your life?

"Post a complaint and get me fired, PLEASE!"
:begs customer:

What would you do (or say) if you were forced to launch yourself from a cannon into a building?

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! ouch."

What would you say if you were forced to never cut your nails or hair again for the rest of your life? And you can't bite your nails either.

"Whoo, Guinness Book Of World Records, here I come!!"

What would you say if you were knocked out and when you woke up you were looking up to see the last bolt on the lid of your coffin being... bolted.

I don't want to die! I don't want to die!

What would you do if you could teleport through your T.V and end up in any show of your choosing?

Pick the simpsons and be yellow!

What would you do if you woke up and everyone had Emoticon faces?

HaHAHAHA you lokk funny
What would you do if you found out that your great great grandpa was Hitler?

"ah... so that is where I get the mustache...." :strokes chin:

What would you do if somebody tossed you a frisbee and it cut your head off?

Probably nothing, considering I've been beheaded, except maybe collapse in a bloody heap on the ground and wait on someone to come clean me up. Psh...you slackers.

Er...

If you suddenly found out the Teletubbies are secretly brainwashing little kids with their primitive language, what would you do?

" MARGIE COME HERE.... lalalala..... MARGE.... Ahhh it's happening again!" :pulls Marge out of the ground and turns the vaccum off:

What would you do if you were the last person on earth with:
Britany Spears (If a guy)
Ashton Kutcher (For girls.... or whatever floats your boat)

Make them my slave, which would not be hard, because they would obviously feel intellectually impotent compared to my innate genius.

I don't have a question. What you do if I didn't have a question?

Make up one for you.

What would you do if you could suddenly transform into any living animal but you only could live with their nasty habits?

"OMG you don't have a question!"

What would you say if you had to say OMG in every sentence?