whence

thank you muchly for taking the time to respond to this. I'll be sure to keep your comments in mind during my next round of edits!

a halfhearted lawl is all this warrants, and even then I feel as if I've wasted breath. Kindly keep waste in its respective bin.

fair enough, then. :p

I don't care if a piece is offensive. Poetry should evoke strong emotions, so that's fine. But when a piece is just careless, crass, and contrived--like this clearly is--it's a ...

Cal, you're basically amazing XD.

Thanks for all the feedback, everyone =] But it's kinda unclear of what you're trying to it something to do with life? It was intended as commentary on the weird ...

well, the letter was supposed to be sent by the narrator to a previously deceased person, with the "can't convey the way that dew drops dry" line showing how even ...

I actually meant "the glass", but I like grass considerably more, so I'm using it now :p Thanks for all the help! *edited*

rhyming kills this poem. It makes it feel contrived and forced--focus on emotion first. I'd recommend you try free verse until you find your 'voice'--then you can go back to ...

Innisfree is from a Yeats poem, and tum-tum tree is from Lewis Carrol's Jabberwocky. The whole thing's very ambiguous and ridiculous, I know XD. Sorry about that.

My main gripe with this is that it is too image dependent. Er, yeah. Maybe I'll give a more thorough crit later... for now, sorry about my briefness XD ~Ed

thanks for all the wonderful feedback! And Fand, I definitely used some of those changes ;)

Ah! Thanks Zee, I've no idea why, but the spacing was awful. Fixed it now!

My apologies for removing this, it's back in now. And thanks again to everyone who gave such lovely feedback!

Googling your first line, with quotes and all, results in over fifteen hundred finds. I think that alone speaks volumes about what you need to focus on.