voiceofdragons

Tenses need to be checked throughout. Once, a long time ago there was a little girl who loved to explore. Here I'd add in a comma after ago. ...that let ...

The last two lines I think a repetitive "I am" would hit harder. "I am not a tightrope walking acrobat. I am tired." But that's just me. I have an ...

***** YES. Okay. This. Lovely. The flow of your writing I love a lot! There's a clear voice here and that's pretty damn awesome. I don't see any glaring errors ...

This was a very interesting read! I think it could be fleshed out a bit more with adverbs particularly around the dialogue. The phrase, "A what?" I think should have ...

Wasn't bad for a rough draft. (My rough drafts are filled with glaring errors, projectile vomit of commas and double hyphens, and questionable syntax.) I feel like you should build ...

"This is a piece I wrote for a contest, but I was too afraid to sign it in." Girl, you should have signed it in! With a little editing I'm ...

"its" > it's I like how short and sweet this is. Very to the point. I agree with PrincessInk in that I feel the second line adds nothing to the ...

I like the rhyming here but it seems off if you were going for AABB. The first two lines don't use rhyme. Line 4 and 5 rhyme with each other, ...

Well I gotta say I haven't watched La La Land, but I'm happy it inspired you. I like the effect of the repetition with the word "across". I like less ...

AW MAN THAT WAS MORBID (this is when I realised it's put into the "horror" category, go me) I do like your use of dialogue here. It makes the reader ...