shadowraiki

Gotta agree with everyone. The beginning was great. It was such a twist because people never dare to tread on that fine line of disrespecting religion in anyway. While you ...

Whoa, the government did something GOOD? What madness has stricken this world? Just kidding. I thought this was an extremely interesting piece, seeing as how you never told us the ...

Hello (wow I had to type that 3 times before I capitalized the h). "Want some?" Lily had had a rough day. Shawn, a boy she'd had a crush, had ...

Hello, this is the first time I've seen an idea like this. I've read books about vampires. I've read books about vampires creating civilizations. But I've never really read a ...

My, I didn't realize this was about religion until it was too late. I loved the little comments of her subconscious throughout the story. However it gets confusing when she ...

Being that this felt like a joke story, I won't be so harsh on it. But in reality, there isn't much to criticise. I loved it. I was laughing by ...

This was an interesting read and I would love to know if you had anything planned for them afterwards. But overall, there were no mistakes. There were a few minor ...

Hello and I hope you have a pleasant stay at YWS. Here is my review. While this piece is already short, you may want to work on the formatting. I ...

Good piece. Emotional, though if placed in the wrong context it might not have the same effect. Here are a few things I noticed: His breath was heavy and deep ...

I like being alone more often than being with other people. It's great to have fun with others, but there are times when they act in certain ways and you ...

What I love most about this is that you explain a lot while saying nothing. I like that you never say a specific word for anything, but you hint at ...

Three things I wanted to point out. First, you capitalize the first letter of almost every word. Is that on purpose? Generally you don't do that in poetry. Second, you ...

I wanted to know how someone in London felt during the riots. Now I know. The poem was moving and has a strong message. But I think your message can ...

That was a beautiful piece, especially the ending. There weren't to many grammar mistakes, however I suggest splitting up the dialouge. Each person talking should be a seperate space as ...

Wow. That was amazing. So refreshing and new. I felt like I was reading one of those short stories in a text book, or a famous story like The Giver ...