rwalgren

First critique is grammar. I find it very distracting I think I caught four in the first paragraph alone. Reread this. after dialogue put a comma then " then the ...

I'm not very good at poetry but I think this is pretty good. It's very relatable the entire first half is my friend and the best poems are the ones ...

Hilarious! I love the spin off of Harry Potter and Doctor. so funny. I think there's a few miss spellings though, easy fix no worries. Very original or at least ...

Quotes need to be by themselves except for when they have "said Emma." or whatever because it's grammatically incorrect to have a quote not stand alone. Also when it's a ...

Hey. "their parents" not there parents. and "Mum and dad were there" not where there. I don't understand how Ellie the five year old would take control and push Riley ...

OHHHH! I like this one. good job picking something with superpowers because it's usually underused in my opinion a lot of other settings/plots have been taken and rung completely out. ...

Interesting plot. Hopefully you do more character development and fix Mr. Right's name because he needs a period after Mr. I take it in this world demons take over bodies ...

Wow really awesome plot. At first, I was kind of confused like maybe he's suppose to be the grim reaper but then my confusion turned to understanding that the whole ...

Very interesting I've never read a plot like this. It really spices things up in literature world. I also like how perspective changes between them. I don't know if you'll ...

You did a really great job of characterization and adding in details subtly instead of like Jasper is wearing plaid pajamas. When you start on the senses you could definitely ...

I feel kind of weird about this story, like here is A rising action it's missing the plot. Is the plot a horse and a goat race? Despite you wanting ...

This was very interesting. The details are really confusing though. Like are the Divinities humans with wings? or like dragons? maybe something else? Why didn't the divinities tear him to ...

This is so good! No wonder you won. I really have no criticisms. But one random question. Please help me! I'm trying to submit my work but I can't tab ...

I love fiction! and dragons! I really like the story so far. One criticism though, grammar. That horrible thing, grammar. When you do dialogue it goes like this: "Sadly, I'm ...

I think you're right. I always have to write an idea I have or a character. My stories are always fiction too because I find real stories dull. Why read ...