paintingtherain97

This is great, from the first to last line. I didn't see any grammatical errors, but there are a few things I think you could do to improve upon this ...

This is really good. It has a natural, prose-y feel to it, despite a great rhyme scheme. The title is a little bit childish, but it kind of drew me ...

This is better than anything I could have written, so I'm gonna go the nit-picky route. Sorry. our blood was burnt in a pot on the stove the rats turned ...

This is really great! It's like you've put into words exactly what I've been thinking forever, and I'm sure a lot of the other writers on here would agree. I ...

In Time, All things become clear Like lambs to the slaughter, the sand draws near, (This should be a period, not a comma.) Forward they charge Cannon blasts at large, ...

I thought this was great! The revulsion that you're trying to show is practically dripping from the poem. I liked that you used a lot of figurative language: metaphors, similes, ...

I like this for a few reasons: 1. It was short. I don't like reading a poem that's really a novel. Kudos because that isn't a problem here. 2. Your ...

I'm not sure what to say to this. I used to try to make up words. These are funny, though. They sound like something high school guys would say in ...

I really like this. I like the angsty way that you're addressing the world, comparing days that are weighted with problems to those of the beautiful spring. You're having trouble ...

I've read a million love poems, and this is the first one that isn't sappy and stupid. Congrats. I really like the beginning two stanzas. It really jumped to life, ...

This is great, especially if it's your first story. I think it really gives a good picture about black life back then. People always believe it's so easy to overcome ...

This is great. The language was nice. It had a nice sound to it, sharp and clean-cut like the angles on a square. The way you included all of the ...

I love this. The melancholy, almost wistful tone, is great for a poem about entering hard times. I like the way you used the rabbit as a sort of symbol ...

This is really good. I love the concept and the imagery. I liked your use of similes, too. But I think that the flow could have been better. It was ...

Nice job. I've battled with depression, still am, and this really captures the feeling well. I liked your sort of...random rhyme scheme, with some of the rhymes in the lines. ...