napalmerski

Heeey, this is an excellent piece of writing. Absolutely by the book, and by the good book, not by the crappy book at that :smt003 . Good sense for psychological ...

There's nothing wrong with Twilight as such, it's the whole vampire genre raised from the dead by Anne Rice that sucks. Haha, I made a pun - vampires suck - ...

Yo, a great little story. Atmospheric. Cool detail with the screaming stones of the great wall of china. /At the Gates have a song called 'city of screaming statues', dunno ...

Yo, Shaundeman - nice, fable-like story. Nice twist-ending too, I love short stories with twist endings. 95% of the stuff is left unresolved - but hey, I like it that ...

Go for it Ben Franks! I see you're going for the 'journalist-thriller writer' niche - excellent! I say - make the prose as flowery and awkward as you want to. ...

Hey, Aspiring, here's a sample of young bond

Yo, I almost never review plot, characters, and grammar, only style and sentence structure. Here goes: They had been told of an abundance of food and jobs that awaited them ...

Yo, nice story, and I almost relaxed into expecting a longer adventure to unfold, before the ice cracked. It is Icarus after all:) Nice way of turning the heat of ...

Yo, this is quite nice, confusing, stream of consiousness impressionism. Actually I'm a sucker for small hints of important past events interwoven into babble. It seemed to be waiting for ...

Yo, adventure! Castles in the desert! Choppers with missiles, wheee! Here is my basic feedback/advice, using as basis the first sentences. The chopper was heavily armed with several missiles and ...

Yo, I read this fragment, it was nice, dynamic style. Two sentences which I suggest need some attention: I think like this for several seconds, my thoughts are choppy and ...

Hi, this is a nice fragmentary little piece, and only two things caught my attention: 1. Kristy was ecstatic and two weeks later, we were going steady. - this should ...

Yo, The cloaked figure peered through the black night, The moon providing faint light as she searching for an exit - here, the rhythm of the description gives away the ...

Amanda smiled her counterfeited glee as usual - I understand where you're going, but I think it should either be 'smiled with her' or 'gave her counterfeit smile' giving the ...

Yo, as such this intro seems to be quite in order. All the elements are there, the nuances though need fine tuning. “Please tell me you're joking,” I pleaded. Olivia’s ...