leparapluie

I love the twist there at the end. It really pulls the poem in together. At first you don't really know what to think of the person, other than that ...

This is such a good poem! The imagery produced is so funny. (In a good way) The "jellied eyes" and "sauteed hearts" just sound so descriptive and meaningful, as if ...

Warrior : An application for employment My lord and lady, I am here, to offer you my service . To knightly vows I will adhere, I’ll do my new state ...

[pre] Feelings surge... My pen bleeds... [/pre] I would suggest taking out the ... after these. It makes the poem feel passive. And still Take this out, or at least ...

Confusion in every thought A life put on the line One heart, recently broken. One heart, recently found. A new connection, waiting to happen? Or an old one, waiting to ...

As an actress, I can completly relate to this poem, especially that last line: "End the show, let it die." Those are my feelings at the end of every school ...

and gave the earth a gossamer gown. I completely disagree with Writersdomain, I think the word gossamer just doesn't work here. It has to be one of the most overused ...

I think it needs to be a bit longer, or you at least need to change it a bit. Right now it's sort of jumbled and it's not going anywhere. ...

I really like the rhythm of the poem here. But I just can't help but feel like somebody is reading this at a highschool graduation somewhere. :wink: Otherwise, it's OK. ...