kingofwernogs

Wow! This sounds exciting! Pleasepleaseplease keep writing! I am literally tensed up because of the suspense. I really like how you switched characters smoothly. To make your story even better, ...

Very good for a school assignment! To be honest, until I read the last part, I thought you had just written this poem because you had been thinking about ephemerality ...

Very good! I was very amused. However, my purpose here is to tell you what needs improving, so I'll focus on that. I actually didn't notice that many errors and ...

Even though you said you decided to write something "easy" that you don't seem confident about, I would say that this sounds exciting and I would encourage you to write ...

Very well done. I thought it was a very good humorous representation of what happens when cultures clash, and I liked the rhetoric used. But, as usual, there were some ...

I really enjoyed this! It reminded me of a story my sister told me she was working on. I do have a few errors to correct, but that's it. So, ...

This is a very well done piece of art (yes, I just called it art. I think it's that good). I was chilled by the vague but grim imagery that ...

I really liked your story. I thought it was very well written and I enjoyed it. However, let me give you some advice: no matter how thin you slice it, ...

I thought this was an AMAZING story. It really captured the emotions of the character, the scenery, and the feeling of helplessness and grief that those who have accidentally killed ...

A well-written story about the real fear a child experiences when there are "monsters under the bed". This is a point of view that is not tackled very often, and ...

I agree with Cheetah on the need for clarification on this. For example, what ARE the Turned, exactly? Are they alive but infected with a disease that makes them want ...

I think that this is a great story with a great storyline, but it needs some editing. I noticed a lot of language that didn't flow very well or sounded ...