fireheartedkaratepup

You're telling instead of showing a little bit. It's pretty helpful for me, since I'm just jumping in, but it's something to keep in mind. I wouldn't worry too much ...

If this is you... *hugs* I've never self-harmed, but I know a lot of people who do, and I'm familiar with the emotions associated with it. It sucks. Now, first ...

" Still so" You don't need so. Ok, onwards. You're purple prosing. I think it's the fact that you're trying to sound British--talk to some of the Brits on yws. ...

Hmm. I love, love the idea of this poem, and I'm surprised it got on the front page with only one review. (Am I seeing things correctly? ;P) Spelling things ...

Nice try on the spelling of dimension. ;P Overall, it's an engrossing story. You pulled me in even though I disagree with the theology and would normally shy away from ...

LAURA DO YOU NOT SEE HOW THAT GIRL IS MISTREATING YOUR BROTHER SHE TREATS HIM LIKE TRASH AND THEN COOS AT YOU THAT IS NOT OKAY GIVE HER A TALKING ...

first thought: Is the protagonist dead? O.o You could probably do without the commas altogether. I'm not saying you should, that's up to you; but the first two seem excessive ...

I should probably have an introduction. I know that I am different, but awesome is a whole other subject. People say this all the time, and you're talking in a ...

Foolish Catullus, stop playing the fool ALLITERATION HO! *cough* If you can, I'd try to switch that first word with a synonym (since I see you're rhyming fool with cruel.) ...

I agree with HomeschooledTeen. You don't have to capitalize anything--many people don't, when it comes to poetry. Some poets even make a point of not capitalizing anything. The layout, however, ...

Oh my word, I love this. It's beautiful. The one criticism I have is this: what's the point? Why is the speaker a bird, and why do they keep changing ...

Hi there! I want to like this poem a lot more than I do. I think you sacrificed quality for rhyming. The rhythm isn't consistent, and you drop us into ...

This poem... the structure seems empty. Hollow. I don't know how else to describe it. I mean the way the lines join together without much punctuation. It's fine, and I ...

Oh wow. I had to read this poem twice, because I didn't realize the not-so-hidden meaning at first. My first reaction was "Awww, I love what you did here!" because ...

.....I knew better than to read this. Knee-jerk response: "....no. Just no." And darnit, I'm curious about the wordplay. I see you're doing something , I'm just not sure what. ...