dante93

Those breaks were intentional. And as for the first stanza you are supposed to read ti with the title. Like Tire of, together.

look at the end of the first stanza. walls growing weaker would indicate you are getting stronger. make it the walls grew larger, grasping me tighter. or something along that ...

I agree, a bit too many words. Its good though, overall. follow the previous comment's example.

quite plainly I agree with the first post. This is repetitive, and needs a lot more work. It is a good idea, but you need to lengthen the poem, and ...

I liked it, but to some it might be construed as superficial, only doing that to get attention. But i guess thats only an artificial message. It was very good ...

It was decent, but some points didn't sit right. Kind of vague, but I like that. It gives one room to think more. Keep writing in this style.

I like the poem, but one point is repetitive, the second line i think. Its one of them, but you re-state the thing twice in the same line. I like ...

I wasnt feeling this poem very much. It was to over dramatic, and overplayed. But keep writing.

sorry about that. look at the title, and then read the first line. your supposed to read the first line right after. Its a technique I use.

haha thanks. this how i write though. some poems change gears. it propels a different message.

I like the layout, but it needs revisions in some areas. Some of the stuff at the beginning is repetitive, and the wording is a bit off. But the overall ...