canislupis

I suddenly find myself reading the same line over and over. I suddenly find myself reading the same line over and over. I suddenly find myself reading the same line ...

Wow..... This was a pretty long post, so you may have to wait for me to give you an in-depth.... :D First of all, what is the main character? At ...

This made me cry. :cry: really sweet, I liked the message. Some minor grammatical and spelling errors which should be sorted out however. :D My mother is my best friend ...

Yeah, definitely work on some of your spelling and grammar. :roll: I liked this though, it gave me a pretty good image inside my head, at least of the rat's ...

Hi! I finally got here early enough to get to review this first! MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! ;) First of all, I really liked this chapter. It had some iteresting developments, even if ...

Again, you need to break this up into smaller bits. Its very discouraging to try and rea d the whole thing. An in-depth critique has already been done, but I ...

Pretty good! What is this Fanfiction of? I'd suggest making separate threads for each of the chapters, and also fix the spacing, so there's a separate line between paragraphs and ...

Ummm, you mispelled "Jewels" in the title. That's definitely a repellent to people who see this and might want to read it. :D I also noticed an error here: Are ...

This definitely had promise, and I think I have to disagree with Meep: "Don't use your age as an excuse I think my opinnion may be slightly biased on that ...

Yeah, I'm DYING!!!! :) Really really nice development..... I don't really have much to say. You are doing a very good job with this. :D I can only hope that ...

Uggh. It was pretty sound from a writing point of view, but it was really morbid. :) Maybe rate this PG at then say something in the descriptions? This is ...

Good point! I definitely see where you are coming from.... Little errors need to be taken care of though........ Here is my critique: Have you heard the phrase, "Walk a ...

Ok, besides the point Twit has, (which I think is a good one) I noticed numerous errors throughout this piece. So, here is my indepth critique. :) A light breeze ...

Nice rythm! I think overall it flowed pretty smoothly. THe one comment I have, besides the ones already posted, was that there seems to be a very quick transition between ...

You can just copy the three posts you just made and put them on the first one, and then delete the separate ones. :D It would make it a bit ...