my mother my best friend

My best friend; My Mother


my mother is my best friend and
no matter how hard it seems
she’ll always be my best friend to me.

my mother isn’t superwoman or
the president of a club
she’s never dressed as a rock star
to make me look good

she say’s I’m her little pooh
and this I’ll never forget
that no matter what;
even when I’m down and sad
she’ll always be there.

my mother has always told me
even if there’s someone special
in both our lives that
we’d always have each other.
sometimes I wonder if there’s
anyone who could love her as
much as me.

I know that I get angry
I know that I get sad but she’s
always there behind me giving
me a helping hand.

I love my mom so much I believe
I can fly. Who cares where I’m at
so long as I have my mom
I know I’ll be happy.
my mom is my best friend.

Comments & reviews · 9
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User avatar
Audy
Review
Audy wrote a review · Fri Dec 07, 2007 8:55 pm

I loved this poem! It's not about something that we read much about (unless it's mothers day or something), yet we certainly need to. My mom and I are really close, but we can get on each others nerves sometimes, but most of the time we're really cool -- I'm always borrowing her clothes and vise versa :) So I guess you can say we're like sisters.

Good job setting across the emotions, I agree that some descriptions would be very nice. I also /love/ the 6th stanza! :D It was just perfect! Kudos to you on that!

I agree with most of the people here, just because it's a poem doesn't mean that you should ignore the capitalization rules. It looks really messy and drafty(my new word) like that.

Okay so, I found the poem was a little un-flowy (is there a word for that? :shock: ) at times... I think part of the reason for that is the inconsistency in stanzas. You don't have to have a set number of lines in a stanza, but it does help with flow and even a pattern would suffice, but here I feel it's totally random. I.E. first stanza you have 3, second stanza--4, third-- 5, fourth-- 4, etc. etc.

my mother has always told me
even if there’s someone special
in both our lives that
we’d always have each other.

sometimes I wonder if there’s
anyone who could love her as
much as me.


Perhaps if you combine these two stanza together in a way, because the second stanza here doesn't add anything new to the table, just further adds to the last one.

If I may suggest:

Even if there's someone special in our lives
we know we'd always have each other.
Though, sometimes I wonder if there's
anyone who could love her as much as me.

Or I don't know. Just a suggestion =P

User avatar
chocoholic
Comment

Aww... that was sweet. Mothers are like that. There was no spelling or gramatical issues that I could see, so congrats on writing a very heartfelt poem!

User avatar
Wolf
Review
Wolf wrote a review · Fri Dec 07, 2007 1:53 am

Hykuas? Meh...did you mean Haikus?
Anyways.
I liked this poem--it was very sweet, even though I can't relate 100% of the time. Unfortunately...

I think you could add more imagery though. Like describe, Oh I dunno, some physical aspect that you like about your mom. Something like that, anyways.

The emotion in this poem was evident though, so Congrats on that!

Keep writing,
Ayra :)

User avatar
Dream Deep
Review

This was sweet. ^_^ Too often, one ends up reading dark and blood-drenched (hyperbole) poetry listing the infinite number of reasons why mothers are the most atrocious creatures to inhabit the earth... and this was a breath of fresh air. I thoroughly enjoyed the tone and message behind this. Very sweet indeed.

On the note of format, though, watch your capitalization. Either capitalize the beginnings of each line/sentence or not, but don't shift back and forth throughough. Also, be sure that your line breaks are natural, and not merely sliced off wherever seems most convenient.

User avatar
MadHatter
Comment

I really liked this one. It was very sweet and touching. I don't know why you capitialized the first word of the third sentence in each stanza. But poetry really doesn't have any rules, except when you write hykuas...I hate hykuas...

User avatar
selenasacuna
Comment

thank you i wrote this for her

User avatar
Minniax
Review

I can totally relate =]
My mother is my best friend.
We have gone through bad times together and it has ALWAYS been her and I, together, through it all.
She is my favorite person in the world =]

Great poem! Nice work. :D

User avatar
canislupis
Review

This made me cry. :cry: really sweet, I liked the message. Some minor grammatical and spelling errors which should be sorted out however. :D

My mother is my best friend and
No matter how hard it seems
She’ll always be my best friend to me.

My mother isn’t superwoman or
The president of a club
she’s never dressed as a rock star
To make me look good

I'm not sure why you capitalized the ;ast line on both of these stanzas, since you didn't do it anywhere else. Be careful with punctuation mistakes like this, they make a poem look less polished.

Overal, this is a nice poem, I really enjoyed reading it. *gives mother huge hug* :lol:



Lily you are my fig father
— Elliebanana