bubblewrapped

Well, I guess by "tidy up" I mean, you need to keep the same number of beats/syllables in each line and establish a regular sort of pattern to accompany your ...

ibelieve_inme I appreciate that you're proud of your poem. I've won poetry competitions too, and it's a real rush, so congratulations! However, just because a poem has won awards does ...

Cheers Phorcys -- I really did enjoy reading the story so far. Let me know when you post more and I'll crit that too...MUAAHAHA... OK, I'm going now LOL

Hey again! Nice to see you're taking crits on board -- this second draft is much better :) NIGGLES: If I can not touch them, The cold of my self ...

LMAO. I cant really crit it (not good at non-fiction, essays, etc.) but I can say I loved it. Really funny ^_^ **both thumbs up**

Sadly, havent read it. My bookshelf is threatening to implode with the number of books I need/want to read, so I havent even BEGUN to think about it. Which is ...

Mr. Everyone -- Nobody's disputing that. But since your experience is so close, your memory of it should be pretty vivid. ry and put some of that in your poem. ...

Well, I dont know. I guess most of it has been said already. In one sense, I liked this - the tone is nice and whimsical, and suits my mood. ...

Cheers Inertia, I've done some touching up here and there and I think it's better now that I've got rid of a few "words" (LOL) and replaced them with other ...

Amen! (One small note - why "thee" in the first stanza? This is a first-person poem, and "thee" is second-person...isnt it? Or am I just not up on ye olde ...

REVISED v.2.0 There are so many different ways that I could be like a thousand mirrors, fragments of faces laugh as I smile. Did I learn my life from you? ...

LOL I'll add my praise too - very cool story. One thing you might want to fix; it's "in a manner of speaking" not "a matter of speaking" as you ...

Yes, I agree - this is a lovely soft piece. Not sure about the second stanza - the last line seems a little (dare I say it) cliche to me, ...

OK...this is seriously going to torment me now. This poem is terrible! **hides in despair**

Yeah, so I was procrastinating and realized that I never actually read the comments on this piece :oops: :lol: so now I have to improve it (anything to get out ...