Published October 4, 2006
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I really like this too. It makes you think about society in general, and it's cool how you got your point across in a story this short. [/quote]
ya i like it too it is true and i luved ur last line soo um... by...
It's the sort of thing I can see myself thinking about days after I've read it. It sucks you and and really doesn't let go.
I like it!
I really like this as well, so dark and gritty but then i gues ultimately quite real. Sounds like it could almost be an anecdote to the insainty of a world that doesn't care.
LOL I'll add my praise too - very cool story. One thing you might want to fix; it's "in a manner of speaking" not "a matter of speaking" as you have it now. Otherwise, awesome. Kudos to you!
Interesting. I very much liked the gritty aspect to it. Has a very male feel to it though, which considering your a girl, is an achievement.
Well done.
Nice job!!! I really liked your writing it drew me in and make me think at the end. I especially liked your last line as it was awesome!
Yeah, I loved the atmosphere in this piece. It was camouflaged at the start with the opening, but it grew as the piece went on and I loved it.
OOOOH! I love this! It's so weird and haunting and everything that OMG! It's not what I expected at all, but that's fine since it totally exceeded my expectations! And the ending sentence? Pure brilliance!
Should be "alleyway."
Should be "Its."
Excellent job though!