bubblewrapped

Hello again! A few things here: 1. Layout. I would recommend that you put this into some kind of poetic structure (any kind of structure, actually) because as it is ...

Hey there! We meet again (I think?). Hope you've been enjoying your time on YWS so far :) Overall, this poem really didnt work for me. Your images were cliche ...

Hm. Not up to your usual standards, xantham gum. It seems rather...predictable. You might want to vary things a bit IMHO! You come to me in search of passion. I ...

Hello, welcome to YWS. Love the username! I hope you're enjoying the site so far :D I'm going to get straight into the crit(ique) here OK? Because I'm really not ...

I tried to post once already but my darn computer went ape and lost it >.< Will try to remember what I said, LOL. Today I met a lady with ...

I liked the rhythm of this one. One complaint, the last line doesnt seem long enough - I'd rewrite to "Listening to the echoes fade." Otherwise, a nice piece. :wink:

As usual, I dont really understand your work CL (which is generally why I just lurk instead of crit :oops: ) but I must say I enjoyed this one. An ...

LMAO I found it hilarious. Gross overuse of exclamation marks, but otherwise amusing. Maybe I'm just weird. As a piece of poetry, of course, it has far to go, but ...

At the risk of being pelted with rotten tomatoes, I kind of liked this. I mean, OK. It was kind of stupid in places (particularly the ending). And the narrator ...

No offense Chantel, but if you cant see what's wrong with it, well...**coughs** We can only hope that one day you do. I'm sorry. I dont mean to be mean ...

I have to agree with write me. The idea is excellent - I know that feeling so well - but it isnt working in this format. Revision is necessary. I ...

Recollection didn’t come easy to him. Like déjà vu, it came capricious. But he didn’t have déjà vu--and never had. OK, first off. I like this opening sentence, but – ...

Hey Miss*Mary, here's your first review :) I'll go through it verse by verse and tell you what I think, OK? *Gasp! The knife falls, upon upturned flesh. the scar--bright ...

Wow. Who can follow a crit like that? LOL. I shall be brief, then. I particularly liked the revision - it wasnt as ... sweet as the first, you know? ...

It rhymed? O_O Oh yes, it did. Gotta agree with Inertia there - very natural, I pretty much didnt notice it flowed so well (and trust me, I usually notice ...