ameliabedelia241

I think this story has a lot of promise, I just have a few suggestions 1. Show, don't tell a lot of your description tells us the characters motivations, so ...

Hey- I think your story is pretty good, so I'm not going to comment on that at all:) My biggest critique is that your need to show not tell. For ...

I really like the dialogue and structure, it's engaging and leaves the reader questioning the destination. I just have a few notes on how to improve a couple of things. ...

I think your story is fascinating, but I think you should make a few adjustments to the way you describe things. I think you should show more, instead of telling ...

This is a beautiful piece that was heartbreaking and inspiring the whole way through. It expresses a theme that so many of us can relate to, myself included. Honestly, i ...

I think this story opens with a bang! But I have a few notes on how to improve it. First off, I think some more subtle description would make it ...

Hey, so I really think this piece has a great rhythm, but I have a couple suggestions on how to improve the overall flow. For example, there are some filler ...

I think this is an interesting layout overall, but I have a few suggestions on how to improve this chapter. First off, your level of description is a bit unbalanced. ...

I like the ideas you present in this story, there are moments of true beauty and I'd love to see them expanded. I really enjoyed the lines where you describe ...

This would make a pretty good duo interpretation piece for forensics-public speaking competitions. I really like the almost...absurdist vibe to this piece, the communication-especially in the beginnin

Hey- This piece has an interesting structure that I appreciate, but I think you have some room to fine-tune it. I think you could benefit from more description and less ...

Very intriguing plot line! The whole time I was reading it my perception of the narrator changed, because i wasn't sure of their identity. At first, because of the word ...

I like the general idea of this, that we have no clear destination, only emotions leading us there, and I completely agree with that message. I love the connection to ...

I think this is a very interesting idea, and I like the photo that accompanies it. It made me think of the book, "things not seen", but I forget who ...

Hey, so this is a very interesting concept with loads of potential! My biggest problem with this piece is that it has too many descriptors. especially in the first paragraph, ...