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Re: Chapter 15: The retaliation
WOW! This my friend is a beautiful piece of work. It has a harry potter vibe to it. Which is not bad at all, because your story is completely unique. ...
Jul 26, 2014 -
Re: Tetris: The Movie (Directed by Michael Bay)
Well this was pleasantly surprising... I'm laughing so hard I can barely breath. Oh goodness, where do i even start? Well from what I can tell there are no grammar ...
Jul 26, 2014 -
Re: Dear Daddy
Okay, so owww my heart just burst into a million pieces! These letters are so beautifully written that they tug at your heart strings. A few things I would like ...
Jul 26, 2014 -
Re: Time of Death (Prologue)
Okay so overall very good start. However, I agree with some of the other reviewers, the first sentence is off. As another reviewer suggested, lose the "does" and change feel ...
Jul 26, 2014 -
Re: As We Know It (Chapter 1)
Okay, so this is really cool. I LOVE it! I think the best part for me is the relationship you've created with all three guys. I didn't notice any grammatical ...
Jul 26, 2014 -
Re: The Story of Summer: Prologue with Book Trailer*
Wow! So, I thought this was a really cool piece. I literally could not stop reading. Now don't get offended by this, but while I was reading I kept thinking ...
Jul 26, 2014 -
Re: Destined
WOW, um just wow. At first I didn't really know what was going on, but as I kept reading I started to get it. I wouldn't worry about that its ...
Mar 3, 2014 -
Re: Random, Possibly Cliched, but then Again, Possibly Original, High Fantasy Epic Prologue (with the pointless love poem since removed)
Okay so first off WOW. I get the feeling this is kind of a play on Robin Hood. I might be completely wrong, but that's what I got from it. ...
Mar 3, 2014 -
Re: The Hybrids (chapter 6)
Hello, first of all i found this "Her eyes shot open and she sat strait up." I believe that you meant to write "straight up" being that what you used ...
Dec 15, 2013 -
Re: Heroes Fall
Hi, I agree with what emjayc had to say. Just watch your verb tense, because it does jump around. I really like Kiere as a character, she is straight up ...
Oct 22, 2013 -
Re: still thinking of one :)
Hi, First off, I really like this story, i think it could be great if you continue writing. The first thing i think would make it better is if you ...
Oct 22, 2013
