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Re: Flash Fiction: Untimely Death
Loved the ending! :D A few things that proved to be hicups for me was the following: - I like how you clearly showed the difference in both the characters ...
Nov 12, 2009 -
Re: Exisle International
Hi Roach! When I first began reading I was a little worried, but by the time I was halfway I realised that I could'nt stop reading! :lol: It flows nicely ...
Nov 10, 2009 -
Re: Escape
Geez, this is great work, and i could'nt stop reading. Thre are a few things I want to know: Is this a western? or does it take place sooner or ...
Jan 12, 2009 -
Re: From Vengeance to Valor
This is a good prologue, but a few things just dont seem right, for example: were they the only survivors? and: on the ruins of a large bloody battlefield. that ...
Jan 12, 2009 -
Re: Sea Spray
Great story! you told in interresting short story that expands becausee of the way you did'nt tell how the captains daughter was killed. he let his mug slip from his ...
Mar 23, 2008 -
Re: The Final Musings of an Old General
Really cool story! i enjoyed it alot! and i really have to praise you more for writing a short story that had incredidible content. Rain crashed down against the glass, ...
Mar 20, 2008 -
Re: The Cossack's Ride
The Story is amazing! the atmosphere was perfect! i could'nt stop reading. only a few mistakes that i noticed: The coach rounded a corner and slowed, as it neared its ...
Nov 30, 2007 -
Re: Teardrops fall to soak my sholulders
nice poem, yet sad in a strange strange way. Rolls down my cheek And falls down To die on my shoulder. The pattern repeats Over and over Until my shoulders ...
Sep 29, 2007 -
Re: The Forbidden City
nice poem! —and I catch a fleeting glimpse, through the emptiness of a hall, where the souls of emperors have been framed— a ghost of a child, enmeshed with the ...
Sep 28, 2007 -
Re: As soon as i get a title, you will know
hi. i liked this story and ill do my best to help you inprove it. the first two paragraphs were info-dump (but dont take it from me, i suck at ...
Sep 27, 2007 -
Re: Songwood
strange...yet awesome.... you have great discription and it was lovely to see the trees in their autumn apparel and a beutiful choice of words. i never heard the word apparel ...
Sep 27, 2007 -
Re: Under the Mountain-Chapter 1, Section 2
i loved the chapter and i cant wait to read the next one! i noticed that you cept repeating phils name. it was like phil...phil...phillip...phil taer... etc. try saying "he" ...
Sep 27, 2007 -
Re: The Death of Pride
This is an amazing poem. the riming was great and i only noticed it being forced once or twice, even though it camoflaged itself in the formallity of the poem. ...
Sep 26, 2007 -
Re: I shall stand by you
This is one of those short but sweet things :) i enjoyed it but you should work on it great job! vince
Sep 25, 2007 -
Re: A silly work called Monsters Under My Bed
Ive come to do two things 1) apologize because i just posted a poem with the same title (without the happy ending) but i didnt see this and im really ...
Sep 25, 2007
