TheElderOne

This is a very detailed work throughout the piece. Good job. So the narrator is allegedly crazy, or she's thought to be by those who know her. In reality, she's ...

This is an exceptional story. You are an amazing writer. I love how Evelyn is the one source of color in the entire work with her red hair and green ...

How interesting. I honestly thought the lady was her divorced mother or something and the narrator did not like her because of some past event. You corrected that in the ...

How...fascinating. So the girl pictures a killer as a man who transforms into herself. I wonder if this would be considered a suicide-homicide or double-suicide since both die when the ...

A fantastic piece. One of the best I've read during my short time on the site. I love how you emphasize that he can't do things fully capable people take ...

A good piece. The detail is very good, and Will's hesitance in his field of study reminds me of a few people I know. This is just personal preference, but ...

It was a very good experiment, and it's fun to see humans from an alien's standpoint. One thing I noted was that you kept changing tenses from past to present. ...

The detail is nice, and it's impressive that you wrote this within 20 minutes. One thing I might do is change some of the 'and's in the first paragraph to ...

So, is Gunther her uncle or someone who simply wants the book? Or just someone who gave her the book so she would have somewhere to live? Oh, I'm too ...

Again, great detail. If I had greater world history knowledge, I would know why Amalah left, but unfortunately I don't. It's interesting to see this from a Palestinian's point of ...

Great detail, but without the mention at the top about the narrator having PTSD, I wouldn't have guessed that she had it. I would have guessed that something had happened ...

Funny. When I first read the beginning, I was reminded of my school life a bit. I like how the anti-Clement is called tnemelC, and I've seen what you mean ...

An apocalyptic setting in a major city could have driven her out, or if the wasteland was actually a former city or livable destination, the woman could have needed to ...

Ah, so the Taker, Sebastian, is some sort of bounty hunter that has smaller bounty hunters like Kyden under him. That's what I'm guessing, anyways. So, I would wager that ...