Breaking of Mind

Prologue

"I am going to distribute your composition," Jack's English teacher, Mr. Harrison, announced.

Jack sat still and looked at the teacher, his stomach churning. Beads of sweat dripped from his head to his shirt.

He concentrated on the teacher, who would soon tell the whole class who wrote the best essay this time. He did this every single time. As soon as he finished distributing all others' works...

He glanced at Clement, sitting three columns apart from him. The knuckles on his right hand were white, and although his lips were pursed, Jack thought he could see those teeth clenched tightly.

Jack's heart thumped against his rib cage. Both being brilliant writers, Jack and Clement were bitter rivals. So far, the teacher had only mentioned Jack and Clement's name during this occasion, and a secret competition, unknown by the teacher, and even by the two originally, aroused. Who wrote the best in class, determined by the number of times their names are called by the teacher at such occasions? Through this competition they would find out.

Right now, Jack had an advantage in this competition by just one point. He wanted to enlarge his lead, of course, but that would have to depend on the teacher.

Clement, like Jack, focused on the teacher, who was distributing the writing papers. The pile on his hands became thinner and thinner until two sheets were left.

The call of this name shall decide the winner of this round.

"Jack, please come and receive your writing," the teacher continued his smile, clearly contented with his writing this time.

Not Jack. His heart felt as though it fell through his diaphragm.

He stole a quick peek at Clement. He seemed much relaxed after the teacher distributed the second last sheet of writing on his hand to Jack.

"A draw," Jack thought glumly as he received the paper from his teacher's hands, trying to keep his facial expression perfectly neutral.

The teacher cleared his throat and pushed his glasses to where it should be, ready to read Clement's writing to the whole class.

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Clement / tnemelC

At the end of the sixth period I cleaned the blackboard, and I was washing my hands in the toilet during the start of lunch hour. As I washed away the last bit of soap of my hands, the water supply from the tap stopped. So my hands went for the sensor, and I looked into the mirror, attempting to notice any mess on my school uniform.

"Clement," a voice, like mine, called out.

Nobody was around, so I assumed the voice came from the mirror.

"Feeling good?" He asked, "Eventually you managed to do it."

I hesitated for a while, reluctant to reveal my true feelings, which were excitement. "Yes."

"Really?" He, in the mirror, nodded, but there were no hints of joy on his face.

The victorious sensation crept away, and unease substituted. "Well, I do think I worked hard for it. Don't you think so?"

His eyebrows yanked upward, as if surprised by this reply. Then it went back to its original position. "No."

"Why?"

"You want to know?" Subtly he offered.

I nodded once. Then again.

He smiled coldly and whispered, "You are a cheater."

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Jack

Jack wanted to study Clement's composition once more, and after lunch he decided to ask him for it.

But he would have to find him first. He had searched through the whole campus, but Clement was nowhere to be seen.

Sensing sweat all over his forehead, he stepped into the washroom for a good splash of water on his face.

And he stopped.

Clement was just there, staring into the mirror, nodding.

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Clement / tnemelC

"I did all the test on my own! All my homework! On myself!" I protested.

He kept his grin. "What about that composition?"

My confidence wavered. "I just read for inspiration! All the ideas were mine!"

The smile on his face was indestructible.

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Mr. Harrison

Mr. Harrison smiled as he looked at the meal in front of him.

Just now he had a wonderful lesson. As he read out the excellent work by Clement this time, the whole class listened so carefully and intently.

"Brilliant!" he thought, as he opened the lid of his lunchbox.

Jack and Clement were two naturally bright writers in the class. Every time they wrote the best essays, and they were still learning and improving. Brilliant!

He stabbed a broccoli with his fork and put it in his mouth.

He thought about Clement's passage again. This time, he was astonished by the originality and thoughtfulness of the carefully crafted content.

He nodded in approval when he finally tasted the unique sweetness of the piece of broccoli.

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Clement / tnemelC

"To be even more precise, you are a liar." He continued word by word.

"I'm not!" I shouted at him in the mirror.

"Yes. You are. Do you remember you mathematics quiz? What, tell me the exact, is your mark?"

"Thirty-eight out of forty."

"And do you recall how you responded to Jack when he asked about it right after the quiz was finished?"

I froze.

"You replied: I lost at least eight marks. Now answer me: why?"

"That...that was only a prediction! It's just that the teacher was quite lenient during marking..."

"Then explain why half of the class failed."

I could not give any more retort. Maybe I really did l lie? Was I deceptive? I knew in my heart that I shall never deserve such marks...

More gently he suggested, "Shall we play a game?"

"What?" I replied weakly.

"A game... in the labyrinth."

"For what?"

"To prove if you are innocent or not, of course."

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I ran to nowhere. My mind was empty.

I was on a huge plains with tall bushes of grass around me. It was pitch dark, and only the moon gave me the least amount of light to illuminate the whole area.

There were no people around. No one at all. The only movement that I could sense was the slightest blowing of wind. The environment was silent except the tremor of the grass.

I just stood there, unknown what to do next. Drawing a total blank in my mind, I have lost all my anchors of hope. There was perfectly nothing to be done. Just stand, and wait for the end.

I could have screamed for help, but would anyone be here to listen to me? I could have run to find aid, but no one would care to respond. All the despairs I had experienced had drained me forever. I had no power and no energy to fight back. None.

Still panting after the attempts to flee, I extended my sight to the horizon. Still an endless field of grass. No hope to escape at all.

Depressed, I sat on the brittle grass. Some already dried up, I did not need to care whether I would get wet. What's the point, after all, if I was destined to end up there?

So many scraps and shards of memories rolled like violent waves in my head. Scraps of reminiscences too faint to recognize, and shards of thoughts too sharp to ignore.

Too tired to sit and ashamed of my hubris, I reclined on the grass. How silly was I to accept his offer? I remembered that gentle, faultless face that told only truth. He had never lost. I stared at the indigo dome, and liquid trickled from my eyes to the ground.

Perhaps I should just weep and wait for the end. But would there ever be an end? My body heaved up and down, still breathless after that long run for the exit.

Thinking of what he, in the mirror, said to me, I realized that I was too foolish to refuse believing what he said.

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Jack

Jack had stood at the entrance of the washroom for eternity, but Clement was still in a trance, staring into his own reflection of the mirror.

The bell, representing the end of lunch time, rung, and Jack must head back to the classroom, but Clement was still standing, completely unaware of the tranquil sound that might have abrupted his deep thought.

Jack ran away.

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Mr. Harrison

Once Mr. Harrison had finally finished eating he put aside the lunchbox and thought of taking the stack of journals to grade, but he resisted. Instead he took more time to think about Clement and Jack.

Clement and Jack were good friends, he was sure, but every single time he distributed the essays they seemed so...edgy. He thought of an analogy of hedgehogs rolling their body tight so that their spines point outwards. That could sum up their facial expression pretty well.

Sometimes he thought that they, especially Clement who was weaker than Jack in Mathematics, had put too much stress and pressure on themselves. More seriously, Clement always seemed to blame himself for any misfortune or fault in anyone's life. The fact, however, was that he had no responsibility to bear most of the time. 

Clement had once confessed that he had the blackboard messed up with chalk markings. What he observed instead was a blackboard clean as new. He had thought that Clement was joking, but he dismissed the incident rather too quickly to admit.

Inner peace, he thought, I must remind Clement of inner peace and a stable frame of mind. He had heard enough stories of students being too stressed and mentally fragile that their mind broke apart. History was not for repetition.

The bell rung, and he packed for his next period.

The door of the staff room opened. It was Jack.

"Mr. Harrison," he sounded very much frightened and shocked. "Please come. It is Clement."

Dread filled Mr. Harrison, and all his remarks planned to give Clement about inner peace were swept away at once by panic and terror.