Tenyo

Hey there Butterfinger! This is an interesting piece, and I agree that it has much potential. The whole scene is well thought up and you've done well getting into your ...

Alexis is only five? Or have I gotten confused between characters? The way she acts and responds makes her seem much, much older. I think it might be better for ...

A good first chapter :) I love the description in this, especially of the storm. The constant reference to it really helps to maintain the atomosphere, and I could quite ...

Hey Kana, happy review day! Sorry it took so long to get round to this. First thing I'll say is that this is an awesome prologue! I was gripped from ...

Hey Dreamwalker! Right, what to do with this... As a piece I like this, but I'm not sure if it's a good prologue. It might sit better as an advert ...

Sorry for the delay, here's review 1.2 I lvoe the characters you've created. They all have their own very distinct personalities, quirks and habits. Either you've put a *lot* of ...

Hey Dude! Sorry for the delay. First thing: you know what sucks? When people give you lots of reviews for the first chapter, but by the time you get three ...

Here goes nothing. Repitition? Repitition is something you always have to beware of, in any form of it. All though this you have used repeated punctuation, which even though it ...

Chapter three! Small talk and chit chat It's alright for every day situations, but in a novel you need a bit more background noise. All this chapter seems to do ...

Me again! Again, a good chapter, something definately to work on, but it does need work. What's where now? I'm getting confused. The vague sense of environment and scenary are ...

I'm back! So, chapter one. It's a little less exciting than the prologue- so much that I'm glad the prologue is there as a hook. Without it this chapter wouldn't ...

Hey Noir! I'm here to plague your novel! I say plague, but the first thing I will comment on is that this is an excellent prologue! It was instantly gripping ...

Hey AM! I think best thing about this piece is that you have briefly mentioned how other people seem to be handling the end of the world, but most of ...

Hey Crest! It's been a while since I've reviewed, so I may be a little rusty. First things first: Presentation. Poems/Lyrics need to look good, and be easy to read. ...

Happy Review Day! Ah, the boulder contest :D I like this piece, though it's sad, you've done really well in capturing the emotions of an inanimate object. The main thing ...