SushiSashimi333

So I assume that you either died or went insane at the end. This poem was very graphic, and really confusing. I don't quite get your message, is it that ...

This was very insightful. Many people don't think about this just because it hurts their head, I like that you thought about it and wrote about it. The ending line ...

OMG! The ending was a big shocker for me, although it was a little confusing on who was talking. The story is going really slowly, but I think that with ...

Wow, that was a really good way to leave things, huge cliffhanger. Man, I really wanna read what happens next. I liked how the character added her input in the ...

The symbolism in this piece is truly amazing yet simple when you think about it. It seems like you have so many messages that were portrayed, and I think all ...

The last simile really made this poem. I also like how you wrote "let's just write in consonants" without using vowels, although it took me a little time to decipher. ...

I love the message in this. So strong and I agree full heartedly! I like how you used Pandora's box in this, I think it added a touch of magic. ...

I love how this story gives a unique perspective that most people don't even consider. The ending I thought was very touching how you brought the title back into the ...

I love the message that you put into this story, it's so true. This is a good piece of writing because it's easy to relate to. The one thing that ...

I really like this. The dialogue is a little difficult to read when next to each other, but that doesn't really matter. I love the fact that there is so ...

Good ending, makes you wanna read on to find out the name. I like how this is short cuz it makes it easier to read. Your story was funny how ...

This story is very easy to visualize and feel the cold throughout the little house. The descriptions of each person were just enough, not too much to bore and not ...

Okay, so since this is a prologue it explains something that happened before the story, first person wouldn't really be the best idea to use in a prologue. Also when ...

Okay, so remember that the dialogue is there for a reason, to show what the character is like and to keep the story moving. You did that fairly well but ...

The grammar needs some work, like the spacing and words and punctuation. The plot is fairly interesting, I just hope that it isn't too predictable. The flow is a little ...