Published March 25, 2013
Ever had the feeling of being watched but not knowing who was? Ever wanted to know who made those creepy noises in your closet but not knowing who did? Ever felt like somebody knew you when you didn't even know yourself? Ever had the feeling of someone stalking you behind your back and not knowing their intentions?
I had at least most of those feelings and I am sure you did too then and now. I have to say it was a creepy feeling when you answer yes to most of those questions. It was even more creepy that a random stranger tweeted me: @Hassanilove #oneofthemostbeautifulfollowers
It was not a normal tweet. I mean, come on! No one would tweet you "beautiful" unless they wanted something from you. Everyone has their intentions.
The only question was: why?
Was it to kill me?
Was it for money?
Was it to kidnap me?
Those questions seemed ridiculous at the moment but I had only one thing to do. I had to find out who this person is and close this mystery. It's a ridiculous tweet. I mean I was not a person who gets fawned over by boys. I was just a simple girl following a few classmates and celebrities on twitter until this happened.
It was just a stupid tweet to find the stupid person.
Let the story begin:
I stared at the tweet a little bit longer until I finally had the courage to look at the tweeter's profile.
I looked at his profile picture and stare a bit longer than necessary. It was a smiley face.
However, as much a cute that maybe, there was still something off. I dragged the bar to reveal any mutual followers. The only person in the list was Jacob. He was one of my classmates and a good friend.
Finally, I dragged the bar up to the "creeper's" name. My best bet was to call him that since I didn't know him and he randomly tweeted me. There stood his awfully beautiful name...
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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137,563 Literary Works • 672,044 Reviews
Good ending, makes you wanna read on to find out the name. I like how this is short cuz it makes it easier to read. Your story was funny how you kept jumping to these random and far fetched but highly possible conclusions. I look forward to reading the next part. So did this really happen? If not then the plot could use a little adding on. If so then there's really nothing to do, good job.
I like it, but you need to work on the suspense. This is really interesting, though, and it sounds like it will turn into a great mystery. In the story, however, it mentions only one tweet, but you then later said that the creeer tweeted her a lot of times. Could you tell us what the other tweets were? Of course, I could have just misunderstood the text. Otherwise, this is great!
...and with that? Let's treat this as a short story, shall we?
This has "plot" in the sense it has conflict, because I've read weirder stuff in terms of plot (thank you, Japan). But do we give anything? Seriously. People read for many many reasons, and, at the risk of making a gross generalization, I will say it's either to escape reality, or to live something they can't. Through character. Character. We don't know anything about this person here. She could be a seventy year old woman, except she goes to school.
All the readers can do is rely on impressions, and that which we are given is of a paranoid (because really, this short story oozes paranoia), very vain, and probably eleven to thirteen year old girl, who probably listens to One Direction.
Basically, there is absolutely no reason for us to read this, except it's rather short and people like reviewing here because look, points. But you haven't given us much proof regarding your worth as a writer, have you?
Hope this helped
~Ita
Tell me about, I know how you feel as I used to get those lovely DMs and mentions from people I don't know, they were telling me beautiful words actually, some were flirting and others were just doing that because they are beautiful and need other people to feel the same.
)
After all enjoy every word you get on Twitter as it really helps in building you confidence.
have a nice day