StoryWeaver13

Honestly, I can't hardly read this because of the way it's formatted and stuff. I dunno if you have some reason for making it like that, but it's really hard ...

I think simplycomplex got it right with saying that it sounded kind of ranting...you got your emotions across but didn't give us a taste of what you were feeling or ...

Wow, this is really a dramatic and powerful piece, I like it. This is a call to the outcasts, that the world looks down upon. We’re all the soldiers, and ...

Wow, I like it! There's something about it that gives it a simple, natural flow while also allowing for enough depth to give us imagery and emotion. I also like ...

I just didn't think this captured the emotion enough for me. I think you told without portraying, and that was what made this not work out. It needed more depth, ...

Wow, I'm impressed, my first poem sounded like...well, I'm not even gonna go there, but this is a really great start and shows a whole lot of potential. The poem ...

There were parts of it that just felt kinda off, but all the same I thought this was a really fun and creative poem! The only problems came from the ...

Well first off I don't think this belongs under historical fiction, because even if it's taking place in the past we really aren't getting much of a sense of that, ...

Yeah, the writers before me really hit the nail on the head with their corrections. Your writing in general shows need for improvement but also reveals a lot of promise, ...

Overall I think this was pretty good, the general idea of a magician and mirrors was a great imagery, and this was all something that I could totally relate to. ...

This really hit home with me because I know how much I would miss my dad were something to happen to him. This was a really emotional story, and while ...

*Liked This was very strong emotionally. When I was first reading, I thought, "Oh, a cute little poem about a butterfly." I was surprised by the depth of the idea, ...

I agree with the first reviewer, I don't like how you put (of time) in the first stanza. I think you could find a more clever way of portraying what ...

This was a pretty good start, but I think you could have reached out to us even further, finding a way for us to really understand and sympathize with your ...

Like somebody already pointed out, really direct which adds a lot of power to what you're writing, but can also cause you to lose depth in other areas. This wasn't ...