SophieSays

Hi, I'm Sophie. Comments are in red. The demonic voices ring through my head. Give in. Give up. They whisper to me sweetly. (I like the first two sentences, but ...

This is a nice idea, and I like some of your lines. I agree with BlueRaspberry about starting every line with 'I'. I also think that you should either focus ...

Hi, I enjoyed this, it has a very nice voice to it, although I did have to read it twice. You do switch tenses a couple of times, but you ...

I agree that this piece needs a stronger 'voice'. It's images are very nice, but I have no idea about who is seeing them. Are they a child or a ...

Reading that letter made me genuinely sad. I thought the narrator sounded much younger in the first paragraph than the she did in the second, unless this was intentional? It's ...

I gave this a 'like' - it's a clever idea. I think all the nitpicky bits have been pointed out, so I'll just focus on it overall. I thought the ...

I really enjoyed this! It was amusing and reminded me a bit of 'Matilda' by Hilaire Belloc and Augustus Gloop (?) from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory! And I mean ...

Sophie - Here to review! I really enjoyed this. Most of the nitpicks have already been mentioned so I think I'll just critique the chapter overall. Even though I hadn't ...

Hi! Sophie here to review - as requested! I really enjoyed this. You are very good at world-building and the characters are already very well developed - and I haven't ...

I really enjoyed this - I'll look out for the next part. This may not make much sense, but I felt like you were describing them as what you could ...

Hi Sophie - me again! I really like this, your style seems to fit romance, although I don't think you should use more than one adjective for each word you ...

Hi Sophie, thank you very much for the gift. I decided to critique your work in exchange, hope this is alright! :) I think PhoenixBishop is spot on with most ...

Hello. I am going to crit this bit by bit, so I won't get as much sense of the 'flow' but I will get how the feel in each one ...

Despite not liking anything too romantic, I really did enjoy this. Today I bought a real guitar-learning set, with a DVD in all I didn't think 'in all' works as ...

Hey, I'm Sophie. I really enjoyed this, but there were a couple of things I thought could be improved. Inspiration is a (n? To match your last sentence?) interesting concept. ...