Sophie

Sam: These...are feeling rocking... No actually, "These are fecking rocking." feck being the Irish equivilant to fuck. You use the word 'rock' in the next sentence, so it sounds really ...

Ok so, note to self: "Lotta love in this room" style thing ruins it a little, try to sort it out.

Wow, there's actually alot of useful critisism. I guess I can edit it and improve it a little, but not too easily, since it means a lot personally. But thanks.

*feels praised* -- Well that'll jynx it and soon I'll get negativity but oh well... Sounds like my poetry's improving! Woo!

I kinda liked it, not sure why. Esp the: "Cuts By Thursday Because it hurts too much Not cliché – She’s not poetic enough for that"

Thanks. I agree about the awkwardness of: "The room, though not, felt empty but for we three Him, me, and his then new guitar" See what you mean about the ...

It is personal, that may explain why you can't get some of it. And it is related to my previous poem Your Guitar.

Woah... Hmm well, can;t think of any constructive critism

Yup. I'll be printing this too. I'll get back to you on Tuesday.

Well..... I'll be printing this off then. Hopefully I'll get back to you on Tuesday.

Sorry, haven't read all of it, only the first section. But I actually really enjoyed it. I'd be happy to read more and properly critique it, if you'd care to ...

1st verse: They’re meant to sound alike. It’s just a terrible, clichéd patern I tend to use. 2nd verse: Thanks for the advice on “took” and “caught”. I’ll work on ...

Yes erm..... "I just want to back to the beginning" is meant to have a go in it -- type fault. And "Compass, needle, or sharp object" is the lamest ...

yes, this is awesome (hehe, I sound American). I especially like the rain bit. Good touch.

You know, I really really like this. I may steal it from you and show it to my egotistic friends.