Snoink

I've only skimmed this, but it looks pretty good! I'll definitely read through it later and give you a less lame critique when I'm more awake. ;) Just two things: ...

Hello and welcome to YWS! Like Cade said, you'll want to do a couple of critiques before you post your own work. :) Anyway, your poem! I think, at this ...

You do dialogue like people writing Spanish do! Who would have thought? I enjoyed it thoroughly, actually. Which is slightly rare because there are few pieces that I'll sit and ...

This is kind of embarrassing. You aren't supposed to make me feel little tears coming to my eyes. :P Anyway, it was sweet. And short. So I cringe when I ...

At the moment, this is just a rant. The reader is being treated as someone who is at fault when that might not be the case at all. Passion is ...

I would probably expand it with dialogue and all that pretty stuff. I don't know... call me a fan for dialogue, but I would have her listened, bored, to her ...

As promised, I'm commenting! Sorry it took a while... my mom took one look at my room and flipped out, so of course I had to clean it. ;) Now, ...

Hehe, nobody commented on this. Weeeeeeird. :P Anyway! This doesn't seem like flash fiction at all since it really doesn't have a conclusive ending. In fact, it looks like it ...

Focus more on her rather than your feelings of her, because let's face it: it's a lot more romantic if you're writing about her eyes and such rather than, "OHMYGOSH, ...

I think you can make it more obvious, actually. Right now, it's all over the place. Is it a message against wife-beating, drunk driving, or relaxing? Or perhaps it discourages ...

I'm a horrible person and didn't read through the other critiques. Oh well. Forgive me for any repetition. :P [The Beggarboy] It was the Beggarboy who found the body. The ...

First of all, welcome to YWS! Next of all, I am an evil reviewer. XD Oh well. Here's my slightly sadistic critique of your first two paragraphs. Enjoy? :P It ...

Very emo-ish! XD But (and here's the important thing!) you pulled it off! You have an ear for poetry and what sounds good with each other, which means that you ...

Hello and welcome to YWS! Now... for the critique [s]of doom and destruction[/s] that you've been waiting for! :D It stalks the night, it stalks the day It seeks out ...

Archangel Michael? Samson and Delilah? :P Anyway! My biggest peeve was it didn't really seem like she was really in a cathedral. If they were talking and everything, there would ...