Shriek

-Mouth waters- Brilliant descriptions there, better imagery than I could ever pull! But agreed with Chandni13: I didn't quite get the rhythm either... Also, caught this typo: Filling you nostrils ...

This is the best I've seen from you yet, Brad. I liked it very much. The pre-chapter was powerful--it said a lot about the character and life, in general. Or ...

Hm. I personally am not a fan of the morbid, "I hate my life" kind of poetry (I'm not a fan of poetry, in general), so I guess my critique ...

Well, the second part was much better than the first, grammatically speaking. So congratulations on your improvement. However, you need to work on placing commas, periods, etc. If the reader ...

Hey, Stev! Glad to see you're still alive and well (and writing some pretty good stuff while you're at it). I liked this a lot, and I think it is ...

Ooh, I liked this. Like Muse said, it's a light read, which was refreshing in contrast with all the serious pieces out there now. I disliked the kiss at the ...

Wow. I liked this a lot. It was a plain and simple enough story line, but the effective use of dialect and characterization were what gave this piece its power. ...

Hmm. This was very well written. As for the actual plot, it was lacking. I hate walking out of a story and having to ask, "Okay, what the heck just ...

Mmm, verrrry good. I love that closing line. Someone once told me that the closing line is like reward for your reader. They've read your entire story, and now, they ...

I stood standing by the window. Not the best way to start off a story. Stood and standing are the same word, except in a different form. Try something along ...

I didn't know what to make of this. It was definately well written--so no complaints there. Just the tone of the piece threw me off. I was confused about whether ...

This was great. Reminded me of The Sun Also Rises in the sense that it portrayed the recurring empty indulgence so well. Although much more poetic than anything Hemmingway could ...

LOVES it. Great portrayal of emotion here. However. (Gosh, I hate to sound redundant, but) I had difficulty telling the difference between voice 1, 3, and 4. Four in particular ...

Gah, this was sad. I was able to hold off the tears until I read the final verse--that was a hard-hitter. I liked the emotion behind the narrator, especially that ...

Haha, congrats on the win by default. This was a very enjoyable read. Kind of morbid in some parts, but overall pretty suspenseful. I felt that the beginning was a ...