Shepherd

This is cool. I think you have really effectively engaged the reader here, from the start. I'm a little tripped up by the lack of capitalization, and some of the ...

Boy you really did jump right into this! (Sorry it took me 80 million years to get you a review!) Personally, I would appreciate a little more build-up, here. The ...

What a cool story! I really like this! There were a few things that bothered me (I'm not talking grammar, of course!) At the very beginning, it seems very disjointed, ...

This is interesting. I think you should definitely develop it a little more--right now it seems to move very quickly and a lot of the potential description has been lost. ...

This is very good! To return it to him Without life. This line, I think, is a little confusing. Because the poem itself (thus far) has been so linear, it's ...

I like the word skipping--I think it lends the story a clipped, guarded air which would otherwise be missing. I really do like this story. It's very well put together, ...

This is a great poem! The only thing that bothered me (and I'm no poet, so feel free to take my advice with a grain of salt or sand or ...

Oh no! I thought this was going to be something about a child, and I came in all prepared to steel myself. And then it was about a pet! I ...

I really, really like this! A few critiques of course, but in all honesty I think this is a fantastic start. I do think this is a little overwritten: you ...

I'm going to review this piece-by-piece because there are some grammatical errors here. My suggestions are in bold! 57 years ago, he was really happy with the news that his ...

I really like the narrative quality of this poem, and I think the concept is extremely strong. You have executed this nicely! A few things that tripped me up as ...

This is very nice! =) I think Hiadel has the setting elaboration down. It seems a little staticky to me. Also, I would definitely try and keep this a little ...

This is something that obviously has a lot of emotion tied to it, which I like. It makes it more intense and interesting for the reader, and you have done ...

I saw this right from the start: as soon as you started talking about that coat I thought about the barn jacket that I have hanging in my closet. It's ...

I am having a little trouble finding your rhythm here, but the first part of the second section is very strong. she emerged out of her tomb This, I thought, ...