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Sassykat

  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: sonnet b-1

    Oh, this was so beautiful! I really liked it! I don't know sonnet structure, so I dare not attempt critique-y-ness, but I just have to say that I loved it. ...

    May 20, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Look at her

    The voice of this piece was clear. I liked it. I couldn't understand parts of it, though, and you need to work on clarification. Is the person you are talking ...

    May 20, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: One Plus One

    I think it's so sweet that your dad asked you to do this. I can tell you wrote this in a hurry, but it has definite potential to become moving ...

    May 18, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Perpetua

    Liked it. Shorter, but got the meaning across very, very well. This poem portrays a very unique emotion; a "you've done something bad to me, but I will forgive you ...

    May 18, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Cheap Entertainment

    Okay. This has potential. I can see the powerful message in this, it's just not blooming to what it could be quite yet. The flow seemed off in several places ...

    May 15, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Elf

    This was interesting. I liked it. It was almost musical, definitely fitting for "lyric" poetry. I like how, in the third stanza, it seems as though this "elf" is, even ...

    May 15, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Life -- The Meaning

    This is indeed poetry, in the artful way you expressed this. I liked it. However, you could make this more recognizable as poetry if you create line breaks. Like so: ...

    Apr 26, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Is There Hope??

    I can see nothing wrong with this other than the last line. You've used too many commas. here is what I think it should be: Yet never able, always failing ...

    Apr 24, 2011
  • Other » General, General Re: Look

    This was....different. I think, though I'm not sure, that this was supposed to symbolize the different views on christ and repentance through different time periods? Let me know if I'm ...

    Apr 24, 2011
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Heart of Hearts

    This was pretty amazing. I loved it. I kind of interpreted it as "I know you love me, but you can't know my secrets unless you have the key--or my ...

    Apr 24, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: standing tall

    animepup, you did miss a couple of things. Let me point them out: The b lood that drips from my veins Is nothing but cold and bitter pain I guess ...

    Apr 11, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: 9

    " co-incidence" I'm pretty sure this doesn't need a hyphen. "and then wonder if I'm wrong or if I'm right" This line combined with the one above it looks like ...

    Apr 11, 2011
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: One of those days

    I liked this. I agree with Amelia, though, you could use a different phrase as your theme. "One of those days..." I expected a depressing thing full of problems and ...

    Apr 10, 2011
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Night songstress

    This is sweet. I like the simpleness of it, and how it just is . Sometimes I like a poem without deep, philosophical meaning to it, something that I can ...

    Apr 10, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: BreAkinG heArT

    Do you know how it hurts To see your friend Say s*** behind your back Being mean to you Totally ignoring you Like if you didn’t exist? If this former ...

    Apr 9, 2011


When she transformed into a butterfly, the caterpillars spoke not of her beauty, but of her weirdness. They wanted her to change back into what she always had been. But she had wings.
— Dean Jackson