SIC

I like how the poem tunnels down. Was the on purpose? other than that I like it. Although the last sentence makes no sense.

There is a daniels story section of that musem, In that section I have personally written a note to daniell, and it is being displayed in that museum. :D

Sounds alot liek that book Daniels story. Ever read it?

I will fix my errors in the future. But I am enjoying the comments. Keep em coming :D

Very nice poem. Makes me think of the big city. I thought it was about the big city but it is called Unspoken rule so it cant be that. Lulz ...

Very interesting way to write a poem. And very good use of DEJECTION. -The cake IS a lie.

Ahck! Very hard to read. It made my eyes hurt. You can try using paragraphs. It feels like a long poem. Couldn't understand much for that fact.

Very nice. A little hard to understand at first but then becomes completley clear. I LOVE IT :D

I just made it up. It is as well as trash any who.

You used apostrophes rather than quotation marks. You should fix that. Other than the quotes, It was fantastic. Very entertaining.

This was a very deep and sorrowful story. It was so detailed and described well I can see it in my mind, completely clear. You let nothing out. Putting so ...

I don't really get it, but I still like how you put it. I like the words you used and how you used them. This isn't the greatest Poem i've ...

From what you tell me it will turn out to be a very good story... But you REALLY need to fix your grammar. also Guy13 called me and told me ...

Its a good story, but very hard to read. With few paragraphs I don't feel like im reading a story rather a article. Try putting some paragraphs in there to ...

I suppose it could be longer. Not to sure what your trying to get across though. I liked the poem very much though. Very clever.