Ross

Very, very good. I liked all the characters. However I think sometimes you need to do this: SARAH: (hesitates and blah blah blah) That will make it more clear to ...

VERY GOOD! Everyone's covered what I said. Just show more, not tell.

"I'm the girl in dark blue jeans." LOVED that line! This was a beautiful poem. Saw no typos and i think its fine where it is.

very good poem. although, i cant figure out why it is in the fanfiction part. r u talking about vampires, wizards, Death Eaters? drop me a line, because im a ...

i loved this, max! although, i can't find "of a stranger" anywhere and i assumed that the title is part of the lyrics. this was very good! Worth a star!

Wow. I was blown away. What Ray did was NOT right! And with your boyfriend right there! This is really one of the most shocking confessions I've ever read.

Very heart feels sorry for the narrator on the way that his/her crush dismisses the saying so easily. :( Worth a star!

This was very sweet, but also a bit weird.

Pretty good start, but it's too poetic in the beginning. Some grounded sentences/phrases here and there could minimize the risk of the reader's head in the clouds. Good start, Angel!

Okay, for all you guys who are saying that this is similar to Twilight. I read the book and I must agree that there are...similarities. But let me inform you ...

This was a good piece, but I think it is more poetry than lyrics. Also, I couldn't find a tune to it. Good, but doesn't belong in the Lyrics section.

Ooh, you had me shivering at the end. It was really, really good. I do agree with Kenpachi about the "weird" phrases. And also, you need to watch your punctation!

It hooked me well, but left me hanging at the end. Pretty good, though! I just don't think this poem is very...compelling.

This is real good! Please please please post more! :)

This is an impressive piece of writing! I like the plot line and I liked how you showed the characters secondary to the setting. I've always done that too. Well ...