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Re: Girl of Crows Chapter 3
Hm... I'm still here... Well, what should I say... It does lack some descriptions, but I'm willing to let that go, since in this chapter you gave some other things. ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Girl of Crows Chapter 2
Okey, he did fly out of the window, I'm content with that. :) Although I would have liked some more description of flying, some more view below or the wind. ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Girl of Crows- Chapter 1
Me again :) I found something that might be wrong (It doesnt have to be it just because I say it is). In the begining there is: "the patron pushed ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Girl of Crows- Prologue
Interesting... Scary as well... You describe well, but I have a question: do crows have orange beak? Or were there other birds besides crows? And one more thing, I think ...
Dec 30, 2012 -
Re: Melody's Storm - Cha. 3
Nice plotting! Mum's a sacrifice! Yay! Some things are appearing. Finally I know Melodys age! One more Yay! Dad for a spy - double Yay! Now a bit more detailed. ...
Dec 29, 2012 -
Re: Melody's Storm - Cha. 2
I can say that the first chapter was better. There they seemed more like kids, but here Jasson speaks like an adult in the end. Children would have probably made ...
Dec 29, 2012 -
Re: Melody's Storm - Cha. 1
I'm not sure what to say. At first I got an impression that it was a lot like "Ella the Enchanted" when you mentioned castle and giants, but it didn't ...
Dec 29, 2012 -
Re: Chapter one of a book I'm working on
I like it. Descriptions are good, you can visualise it in your head. Really unexpected that vampires and werewolves are ruling humans, mostly it's the other way around. Good job. ...
Dec 29, 2012
