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Re: The Chase Introduction.
Hi, WeirdGrace. Hope you're settling in well to YWS. I'm Pan, and I'll be cooking up a review for you today. First of all, you've got a cool idea here. ...
Sep 16, 2016 -
Re: Bundle of Flowers ~ Chapter 1
Hi, EternalRain! I'm Pan, and I'll be frying up a review for you today. First of all, I love your clear, direct writing style. So many young writers (and older ...
Sep 13, 2016 -
Re: Stranger Days (FIRST)
Hi, Whitlinger. Welcome to YWS! I'm Pan, and I'll be frying up a review for you today. I really like this opening! I was a little unsure when I first ...
Sep 2, 2016 -
Re: Stolen Secrets: Chapter 1 Part 1
Hi, Turtles514! I'm Pan, and I'll be boiling up a review for you today. You've got an interesting start here. I like the shortness of it, and you're great at ...
Aug 29, 2016 -
Re: Annabelle, Intro+Chapter 1
Hi, Bluegirl135. Welcome to YWS! I'm Pan, and I'll be cooking up a review for you today. Well, I applaud you for tackling such a mature subject at such a ...
Aug 29, 2016 -
Re: The Correlations - Prologue
Hi, plaguewritings! I hope you're settling in well at YWS. I'm Pan, and I'll be boiling up a review for you today. First impressions? You've made a solid start to ...
Aug 28, 2016 -
Re: The Boy In The Hat (Short Preview)
Hi, Dustbunny14. I'm Pan, and I'll be frying up a review for you today! So, you've got an established cast of characters in this preview. Props to you for starting ...
Aug 26, 2016 -
Re: The True Monster
Hi, CupcakesForRealMen! I'm Pan, and I'll be frying up a review for you today. First of all, I love the concept of this story. I'm a big sucker for dragons ...
Jul 21, 2016 -
Re: chapter one - title undecided
Hi, Saraleone. Welcome to YWS. I'm Pan and I'll be reviewing your work today. So, I get that this is a very early draft for the opening of your novel, ...
Jul 20, 2016 -
Re: Cheap Cigarettes
Hiya, Ellstar. Pan here to review! I really, really like this piece. It's dark, interesting, mysterious, and I think it tells the reader just enough without being overbearing - you ...
Jul 19, 2016 -
Re: 0.3 - Prologue
Hi, MeherazulAzim16. I'm Pan and I'll be sautéing up a review for you today. We are human beings. And it's in our nature to fear the unknown. Great opening! Strong, ...
Sep 6, 2015 -
Re: Chapter 1
Hi, findingme. Welcome to YWS! I'm Pan, and I'll be boiling up a review for you today. I'll make it quick, because I have a tendency to write reams and ...
Aug 19, 2015 -
Re: Chapter 1: Awakening
Hi, Sillia! I'm Pan, and I'll be brewing up a review for you today. I wouldn't normally review a piece with two critiques, but I'm going to make an exception ...
Aug 10, 2015 -
Re: HEAT OF THE NIGHT PART 1
Hey, gorgeousgirlSky3. I'm Pan, and I'll be boiling up a review for you today. So, this is a pretty strong start to your story. It's concise, clear, with a nice ...
Apr 25, 2015 -
Re: Elana - a preservation of a memory
Hey, sociohat! I'm Pan, and I'll be happy to review your work today. First off, nice writing style. That's what stood out to me most about this piece - it ...
Apr 4, 2015