Pacific_Sky14

But i will die. That is innevitable. But my heart is quite inheritable. I really liked that line. I enjoyed it, it was funny and interesting. The last line caught ...

I like it, :] I want to edit this, he he, so here is some tips. Some love is repeated in every line, so this would sound much better....^.^ Some ...

Wow, that is good. It is very creative as said previous! It sends out a warning message and I liked that you did that. One, thanks for bringing that message ...

Wow, I like the depth that is in the lyrics! From 1 to 4 on musical qaulity, it's a three!! That's good It has very strong emotion and the background ...

I like how it ties up. Although, it sounded a bit rough, I can't quite pick the words out. Overall it was fantastic. One word that bugged me because it ...

To your post previous, it sounds a bit rushed, I don't know. Oh, but I love this short story! Although, it does seem a bit cliched and unrealistic, just a ...

"Like timid dormice your hands retreated into their sleevesaway from winters chill bite as I sucked the last dregs of life" That was my favorite line!!! Although, dreamy was right, ...

Aww, so romantic! Ooh chills running down my spine boy. That was really good! No, it was fantastic. Where did you learn to write like that? Wow, I bet if ...

"The curving, desert pathis one that few willingly risk.The thick, warm airand the hot, blazing suncould driva a man insane,if he doesn't die first." Wow, you used neat-O adjectives here. ...

I rated! :) Ok, so you have a good rythym. You used the adjetives well in this poem. "The erosion batters into itself like fire. Fighting fire." This part I ...

"The sand seems grey with desire and as my happiness is rusted away" the sand being gray with desire doesn't sound right, why not say something different and you can ...

Wow, "You see that look when she looks in your eyes Well it’s not the same as it is in mine" That was my favorite line! For writing songs, you ...

Wow, that speaks very deep. It is very good yet emotional. I don't know...but it kind of creeps me out, but not in a bad way. The lines were very ...

"“Just a seconded ill call you,” but then you’re not there" I tihnk you meant to type, "second" :) I like your song. It's cute. :D My fave lines are ...

This was amazing. I liked the whole idea to it. There's not much to say, but if I knew what how the song went I wouldn't have to tell you ...