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Re: The island, Prologue, attempt 2.
This is beautifully written! I really liked all the descriptive words, I'm a sucker for description. From this sentence on "the man says whilst walking down the gradually descending ringed ...
Oct 20, 2013 -
Re: Dear Diary
I don't really know much when it comes to poems but I'll do my best to review yours today! This poem was a really interesting concept but I think you ...
Oct 20, 2013 -
Re: The Cat's Calling
I really liked this story! I read the whole thing and the descriptive words you used were perfect and I didn't see any spelling errors and not very many punctual ...
Oct 20, 2013 -
Re: Priorities of a Teenager
I really liked the way the first paragraph started out. It was a perfect definition really about how we today, as teenagers feel about the word success. It was a ...
Oct 17, 2013 -
Re: Curiosity killed the cat or Curious cat killed a …
I really loved how much description was used in this story. The words chosen fit perfectly in the text. I especially loved this sentence. "The place total dark got lit ...
Oct 17, 2013 -
Re: My story.
This is a great piece to start with. I think the beginning really clearly demonstrates how most writers feel, afraid their work with be scorned and thrown over other's shoulders. ...
Oct 17, 2013 -
Re: Love and Lies: Chapter One
Firstly, I noticed you switch back and forth between tenses, and I do this too so don't feel bad. For example, at first you said "the man HAD come in" ...
Mar 10, 2013 -
Re: That Girl Part 2
Interesting. I can't believe how snotting and mean this girl is! At first I was really really confused but you explained everything wonderfully and at the end I'm just sitting ...
Mar 10, 2013 -
Re: Somebodies.
This was a really different story, the kind of story that I wouldn't normally read. But it contains things I wouldn't normally think, and I REALLY liked it. It was ...
Mar 10, 2013 -
Re: Danielle and Rebecca's test.
I'm honestly really confused right now. It was an interesting plot that sucked me in, and I really like the kinds of stories that confuse you in the begining, but ...
Mar 10, 2013 -
Re: Rising Danger sample
Chapter One Today was supposed to be special but instead Chyna Lorne was in her one bedroom apartment in Butte, Montana, throwing clothes in a suitcase that had belonged to ...
Jul 15, 2012 -
Re: The beginning of us ( chapter title )
I absolutely loved this, WRITE MORE! The only thing I noticed was this. You didn't finish the quoation marks.>" The thing is Mom. Your opinion hold no value in my ...
Dec 8, 2011 -
Re: Hidden Illusions Chapter 4
Melanie walked into the gym Friday night and headed straight for the front. Spotting Mark alone, she walked over and sat down by him. Brittaney appeared next to them a ...
Nov 7, 2011 -
Re: Headlights
Very descriptive and nicely writen, I loved it because I can relate to the story. It's very unique and full of it's own kind of spice! Now to the nit ...
Aug 27, 2011 -
Re: Gravestone pt.1
I don't mean to be rude, but hear are my thoughts: The story had a good plot to it. It could be very interesting and exciting if you add some ...
Aug 27, 2011
