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MandaPanda1031

DeafeningSun

  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, Teen Fiction Re: The island, Prologue, attempt 2.

    This is beautifully written! I really liked all the descriptive words, I'm a sucker for description. From this sentence on "the man says whilst walking down the gradually descending ringed ...

    Oct 20, 2013
  • Poetry » General, General Re: Dear Diary

    I don't really know much when it comes to poems but I'll do my best to review yours today! This poem was a really interesting concept but I think you ...

    Oct 20, 2013
  • Short Story » Teen Fiction, Romantic Re: The Cat's Calling

    I really liked this story! I read the whole thing and the descriptive words you used were perfect and I didn't see any spelling errors and not very many punctual ...

    Oct 20, 2013
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: Priorities of a Teenager

    I really liked the way the first paragraph started out. It was a perfect definition really about how we today, as teenagers feel about the word success. It was a ...

    Oct 17, 2013
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: Curiosity killed the cat or Curious cat killed a …

    I really loved how much description was used in this story. The words chosen fit perfectly in the text. I especially loved this sentence. "The place total dark got lit ...

    Oct 17, 2013
  • Short Story » Realistic, General Re: My story.

    This is a great piece to start with. I think the beginning really clearly demonstrates how most writers feel, afraid their work with be scorned and thrown over other's shoulders. ...

    Oct 17, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Romantic, Mystery / Suspense Re: Love and Lies: Chapter One

    Firstly, I noticed you switch back and forth between tenses, and I do this too so don't feel bad. For example, at first you said "the man HAD come in" ...

    Mar 10, 2013
  • Short Story » Realistic, Romantic Re: That Girl Part 2

    Interesting. I can't believe how snotting and mean this girl is! At first I was really really confused but you explained everything wonderfully and at the end I'm just sitting ...

    Mar 10, 2013
  • Short Story » Narrative, Realistic Re: Somebodies.

    This was a really different story, the kind of story that I wouldn't normally read. But it contains things I wouldn't normally think, and I REALLY liked it. It was ...

    Mar 10, 2013
  • Short Story » Horror, Mystery / Suspense Re: Danielle and Rebecca's test.

    I'm honestly really confused right now. It was an interesting plot that sucked me in, and I really like the kinds of stories that confuse you in the begining, but ...

    Mar 10, 2013
  • Novel / Chapter » Romantic, Supernatural Re: Rising Danger sample

    Chapter One Today was supposed to be special but instead Chyna Lorne was in her one bedroom apartment in Butte, Montana, throwing clothes in a suitcase that had belonged to ...

    Jul 15, 2012
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: The beginning of us ( chapter title )

    I absolutely loved this, WRITE MORE! The only thing I noticed was this. You didn't finish the quoation marks.>" The thing is Mom. Your opinion hold no value in my ...

    Dec 8, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Romantic, General Re: Hidden Illusions Chapter 4

    Melanie walked into the gym Friday night and headed straight for the front. Spotting Mark alone, she walked over and sat down by him. Brittaney appeared next to them a ...

    Nov 7, 2011
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: Headlights

    Very descriptive and nicely writen, I loved it because I can relate to the story. It's very unique and full of it's own kind of spice! Now to the nit ...

    Aug 27, 2011
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: Gravestone pt.1

    I don't mean to be rude, but hear are my thoughts: The story had a good plot to it. It could be very interesting and exciting if you add some ...

    Aug 27, 2011


Let the wild rumpus start!
— Maurice Sendak