Layleun

Candles all raised high, against the growing dark. The fire in our eyes, the fire in our hearts. The passion of the hour ((No comma)) may yet withstand the night. ...

Have you ever wondered why you were so different from everyone else? Why no one seemed to acknowledge that you existed? I do. I have had a secret for a ...

Hmm. Very good I'd say. Your unique style of writing makes this piece awesome. The whole sensory overload described in a few paragraphs ^.^ I found a few things that ...

I think we can collectively agree that the pregnancy turned everyone off. I almost stopped reading there XD Then I realized that I needed to finish the book, not want ...

That was amazing XD I laugh at practically anything and everything so my opinion doesn't necessarily count but I was crying by the end. I adore Stephine Meyer's story but ...

Alright. When I came here I promised not to be a sap and be all nice to the people who haven't developed proper writing skills yet. So here's the truth, ...

I really like this piece. It seemed more like a poem to me but it works alright as a piece of fiction. The Goods: I enjoyed how the very child ...

Okay, Ash Bash. Only a few grammatical errors. ((“Europa, Polosk-see if you can find food. Porla and Tilon-you can rest. I will keep watch.”)) Instead of dashes, try using commas ...

I love Jacob ^.^ Of course I would, he's a werewolf! Other than that I really like how he's a child who goes against the rules *glomps Jacob* I can't ...

Ah! Timea! Sorry I took so long to crit. this. Midterms are over and I finally have time ^.^ Good: Discription. I absolutely love how you packed all that description ...

A very interesting writing style. Different form anything I've ever read. That's good. There were a few glitches and a whole lot of good things. The Glitches: I think the ...

Pretty good, original and interesting. I should like to see some more of this ^^. Few minor mistakes I caught but nothing incredibly horrible. -------------------- Gathers stood behind stalls selling ...

Excellent. You presented the idea well and you had few problems. Trying to make each other proud She , standing with people yelling Him, hearing the roar of his crowd ...

Eh, I'm a little iffy. I liked the overall storyline but I really didn't like how you just jumped in without explanation. At first I was, "Ok, let's give him ...

The concept of the poem was a bit confusing. Were you baby sitting and the child asked you about lightning? That's what I pulled from it. Could use a bit ...