I'll agree that this is really stupid (I mean absolutely stupid!), but don't take it seriously. If you do, you might get sorely offended....just remember, this is strictly a parody. If you want to, just put your brain on the shelf and go ahead and read.
I like to think it's a little funny, but I could be wrong...
____________________________
Scene I: Fan Fic
Script for FANGS! (Exclamation point required)
E: (walks across the parking lot and holds out his hand) Hello, my name is Edward Colon.
B: Bella (shakes his hand, then laughs). Poor you.
E: Why?
B: Your last name.
E: What about it?
B Come on, you know...
E: No, what?
B: Well I don't know, it's your last name.
E: Yeah. Colon.
B: Don't you see it...?
E: What?
B: Your name!
E: What do you mean?
B: What do you mean what do I mean? That's worse than Stain, or Barf Bag, or McLovin'!
E: Oh, Superbad? I love that freakin' movie! "I am McLovin'!" But what does that have to do with my last name?
B: It sounds nasty!
E: How? You're making no sense!
B: You moron! Colon! Colon!
E: Yeah...so...
B: Oh, nevermind, you idiot.
E: What did you just call me? (gets mad and shoots her) Oops. (silence) Oh! I get it!
(walks away)
E: Hey Alice! Guess what this girl just told me!
****
Scene II
(B enters classroom)
M: Hi, I'm Mik.
B: Hi, Mike, I'm Bell--
M: Uh, it's Mik, Mik. Like prick. Or d--
Teach: Okay, class, in your seats. NOW!
B: (walks to her seat) Oh, crap.
E: Hello, Bessie.
B: My name's Bella.
E: Right. How's your leg?
B: You shot me.
E: I know. How is it?
B: You shot me.
E: Yeah. Are you okay?
B: You shot me three times. My leg almost came off. I'm limping.
E: My dad said you would. He operated on you, didn't he?
B: Yeah, so? You shot me!
E: I know! Hey...(sniffs the air) You smell good!
(Silence)
E: Really good!
(more silence)
E: (whispers) Hey, Bree.
(silence, taps her desk)
E: Breeee (silence) Breeee (pokes her with his pencil) Bree!
B: Ow! I'm bleeding! (looks at E) What?
E: (waves) Hi. (sees the blood) Uh-oh...
****
Scene III
(B enters home)
B: Hi Dad.
C: Hi.
B: Can you help me up the stairs?
C: Why? You can walk.
B: I got shot, Dad. With your gun.
C: Hey, it's not my fault he stole it.
B: Yes it is! You left it in a bathroom!
C: So? You pissed him off.
B: He's an idiot!
C: With a gun. He's the last person I'd mess with.
B: You're the sheriff.
C: Without a gun! What do you think I am, stupid?
B: (mutters) Yes.
C: What?
B: Nothing! Help me up the stairs!
C: Oh, Edward called. He says he's sorry.
B: It's about time! Is he giving the gun back?
C: Not for that, for poking you in Biology. It was an accident.
B: What? He apologizes for that?
C: Yeah...(silence)
C: What's for dinner?
****
Scene IV
(B sees E in parking lot)
E: Oh, hi Belinda. (smacks him)Ouch! What'd you do that for?
B: You apologize for poking me with a pencil but not for shooting me? You could've killed me!
E: It was an accident. And a pencil can't kill you.
B: Not the pencil, the gun!
E: I never poked you with a gun.
B: No! You shot me! Three times!
E: I did? (B stares while he thinks) Oh yeah! (laughs) I remember it like it was yesterday.
B: It was yesterday!
E: What? No. (shakes his head) It was a long time ago.
B: I've only known you for two days!
E: Whatever. You wanna go to Seattle with me tomorrow? (B glares at him) What?
B: You... shot me...
E: So?
B: What guys shoots a girl, then asks her out>
E: Maybe that's his way of saying he likes her.
B: By shooting her?
E: Hey, some guys flirt differently. I didn't make it that way. Anyway, wanna go?
B: I---! (rolls her eyes and sighs) Oh, what the hell.
E: Cool. See you, Britney.
B: Bella! It's Bella you idiot!
E: (turns around) What? (tries to shoot her but there's no bullets, so he throws it at her, knocking her out)
(silence)
E: Oops. See you tomorrow!
_______________________
And keep your eyes out for the sequels to Twilight's FANGS!:
The movie based on New Moon (FUR!)
And, of course, the movie based on Eclipse (FIGHT!)
(Heh, heh, heh, just kidding...)
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
*stands up in seat and applauds* You are a genius my friend! Lol, I loved it! Charlie was awesome!
Keep up the awesome work!
-Irish
Ahaha! Thanks for that! You made my day!
I LOVED it!
xD
People on here write the best Twilight parodies. I love yours too. I like when Edward shoots Bella. I made me laugh so hard I almost fell out of my chair xD I like how everyone seems totally oblivious to Bella's pain and suffering.
xD
People on here write the best Twilight parodies. I love yours too. I like when Edward shoots Bella. I made me laugh so hard I almost fell out of my chair xD I like how everyone seems totally oblivious to Bella's pain and suffering.
that was really funny.
This was pretty funny, but a bit repetitive, and that got on my nerves a bit. I hate Twilight as well! Yay for the Anti's!
However, the script was a bit... lacking (?) in some respects. It just seemed random, without a point, the dialogue was very short and I would have liked some more character action.
But, you did a better job than Meyer, because your version of Bella and Edward actually had a personality, (be that an annoying one, but nevermind that).
So: Funny, (lulz) and inventive, but also repetitive and slightly random.
^^
Charlotte
I'm actually a fan of the books, but I HATED the movie. I love the part where he was asking her out and she was like, you shot me, and he was like, maybe that's just my way of telling you I like you. AHAHAHAHAHAHA I love it!
Hi I found this really funny, my only thing is that after the pencil i immediately assumed he was going to bite her, i was disappointed that he didn't. However I still maintain i am a twilight fan and for that how dare you be so mean about twilight. I loved it, can't wait for the sequel!
I loved this! It was absolutely hilarous, even though I like Twilight and have read the series twice!
Great job!
Hahaha, I'm an original Twilighter (before all this craze)
And I must say, that had me in stiches.
As soon as my friend comes over I'm making her read it too!
Haha.
Please, please write the ones for new moon and eclipse!
Heey.
Haha I thought this was pretty funny. It was short and humorous and I liked the fact that only two people talked in each skit because I didn't bother looking at who was talking, I just remembered the one before and worked it out from there.
Okay... onto the not so nice part.
I think this was funny, yes, but I also think at times it was a bit stretched out. The jokes were funny, but even so you don't have to keep re-using it and milking it for all it's worth until finally it becomes boring and annoying. This was seen a bit in the first part. Also, I think you should remove the 'shot three times' part. Leave it at he just shot her once, three times is unnecessary. Also if it was three times she probably wouldn't have a leg at all by the end of it me thinks.
xxMiaxx
Heey.
Haha I thought this was pretty funny. It was short and humorous and I liked the fact that only two people talked in each skit because I didn't bother looking at who was talking, I just remembered the one before and worked it out from there.
Okay... onto the not so nice part.
I think this was funny, yes, but I also think at times it was a bit stretched out. The jokes were funny, but even so you don't have to keep re-using it and milking it for all it's worth until finally it becomes boring and annoying. This was seen a bit in the first part. Also, I think you should remove the 'shot three times' part. Leave it at he just shot her once, three times is unnecessary. Also if it was three times she probably wouldn't have a leg at all by the end of it me thinks.
xxMiaxx
Oh my gosh. I loved this. I think that is so funny. Maybe you should really think about taping that and put it on Youtube. I think that it is so awesomelly funny to make a spoof of Twilight.
I loved how you used the name Mik and use all ryming words but kept the nasty words out of it.
Ok this was really good. I thought it was very funny. I especially like the fact that you kept cuss words out of your script. I've read the first three books and thought they were so overrated. They were good but not the best like everyone was raving about. I especially hated New Moon and no not because stupid Edward wasn't in it for half of the story but because Bella wouldn't get over him. She was way too depressing and addicted it was crazy. So yeah keep up your great work I hope you do other things besides fanfictions or parodies. Lots of Love.
At first, I really thought I wasn't going to like it, but then I got to reading it and I couldn't stop.
And now, I can't stop laughing.
My parents think I'm a little weird, but I think I might let them read it too.
(They also read and liked the books and the movie.)
But again, this was great.
I really can't think of anything more to say.
Ha! I seriously hate Twilight and Stephnie Meyer. With a passion! This was funny in a little kid kind of way.
M: It's Mik. Like Prik. Like D-
Haha. I laughed like for an hour when I read that. It reminded me of an inside joke my freind and I had. (:
~Nicole
You do realise that there are enough people who hate the book with a passion? Like me!
Sorry, when you grow up with the vampire chronicles, the twilight series isnt even somewhat exsistent in it's world.
And mary sue characters like edward just dont apeal to me in any sort of way..
Hence why I thought this script was quite charming
omfg i friggen love you for doing this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE U!!! haha that was hilarious!!!!!!! and who cares if the crazy twilight lovers r offended this is funny!!!!
I love the Twilight series, but I have to admit that was amazingly hilarious! Bravo!
I love the Stephenie Meyer books and at first when i read the title to this I really didn't want to read it because even though people (for instance, you) may not like the books, they do not have to hurt their name. But, I really have to admit, I was laughing the whole time! It's ridiculous, but that's what it takes to make people laugh these days. Keep going, kid!
HA. Is Twilight really that funny? if so i should read it!
This was my favourite part.:
E: I remember it like it was yesterday.
B: It was yesterday!
I know it is not that great but I still was laughing bit. anyways. nice work. wow you got a lot of views.
YO PEACE OUT
TREE
I like Meyer, but yes, this was quite funny. Good job on the humor. I'm not going to bother with nitpicks or anything, because you said you weren't sure you wanted to continue this, so...
I absolutely loved this! For people who had a problem with this (me: rolls eyes) they seriously need to lighten up! I personally despise twilight, and I love parodies of everything. I think you should make more!!! Here is my favorite part!
C: Why? You can walk.
B: I got shot, Dad. With your gun.
C: Hey, it's not my fault he stole it.
B: Yes it is! You left it in a bathroom!
C: So? You pissed him off.
B: He's an idiot!
C: With a gun. He's the last person I'd mess with.
B: You're the sheriff.
C: Without a gun! What do you think I am, stupid?
B: (mutters) Yes.
C: What?
B: Nothing! Help me up the stairs!
One again... great job! =D
Wow ,that was funny.
I tried not to be too offended ,because I love the book .
I liked it ,like it was nothing major ,but it was kind of funny ,like enough to cheer you up .
hah "Wanna go to Seattle?"
"You shot me!"
Lol
ahahaha
omg, that was hilarious.
E: I did? (B stares while he thinks) Oh yeah! (laughs) I remember it like it was yesterday.
B: It was yesterday!
hahahaha.
i cant wait to read more. that was too funny.
definitely my favorite
OH my god, I totally love that movie, but that was HILARIOUS. I've never seen a spoof of Twilight thus far, until now, but I think it was great... HAH! I loved the violence (shooting Bella, knocking her out) and I love how everyone is so...stupid. Ha. Funny stuff. Keep it up.
this is high-lar-i-ous, i was laughing so hard, they should have used this for the movie
I was cracking up at my house and everyone thought I was crazed. I love the books but that was funny when Bella was like "You shot me," and he was like "I did," and he poked her and ahahaha he apoligized for that and not shooting her. And the "You smell good," forget worhsiping Stephenie Meyer I loved this!!!! Haha made my day. Even though, don't get me wrong, I love twilight.
LOL. Just, LOL. I mean, you made me laugh so many times in this it was like reading... well... a funny Twilight parody.
Not implying, but Paws will be the greatest combination of New Moon and Jaws ever...
I'm gonna make my Twilight parody eventually, Forks Washington Musical. No promises but the setlist may be Hungry Like the Werewolf(Jacob), You Watch Me All Night Long (Edward watching Bella) New Kid in School(Bella) Vampire Man(Iron Man, Edward)and There Was A Time for every backstory. No promises...
Oh. My. God.
This was hilarious. Absolutely hilarious. You got the characters all topsy-turvey and inside-out. Haha. I can't stop laughing.
Oh my Lord, though, I used to love the Twi books (hate them with a passion now), but making a farce out of the characters is the best. I love these Twi fanfics.
Gold star. For hilarity.
This thread was freaking awesome!!! I mean I was laughing so hard I had a Charlie
Horse!! (no pun intended) But anyways my Mom gave me that your on crack or
something face, it was freaking hilarious. Now you know it's funny, because I never use the word freaking unless I'm really happy.
AHAH! Let me tell you, i am a wilight fan but God... I loved this, it's so hilarius...
Excellent job! Loved it! Keep going!
Shauni
OMG! Please continue this! I absolutely love it. it's completely hilarious. I'm a Stephenie Meyer fan. I've read all the books and I've seen the movie, but this is just hilarious!
Gold star
Lol. Well, I'm not a total hater of the book but I think this is hilarious. I like how you made Edward stupid. Some of the parts that made me laugh:
Lol. One similarity between this and the book is that Edward bugs the crap outta me. I'll definitley be on the lookout for more series. Great job!
It's all right. It's finally all right.
I think Stephanie Meyer is pretty average. But that was really good.
I loved it. It's only a joke anyway...I loved it and it was pretty brave of you to post it lol.
Well done!
I liked:
"Hey Alice. Guess what this girl just told me!" There was something funny about that.
Also, the shooting in the leg was funny.
I want more!
But yes, I agree, maybe Bella should have given up with correcting him every time
You do know his last name is CULLEN, right?
I am a devoted twilight fan and i don't really like people taking a piss from the book but i think this was quite hilarious, write more fan fic please, please, please.
I think I may cry. . .
*gigglesnorts*
Stephanie Meyer = Bane of my existance.
This great though.
haha I love the actual books and you had me cracking up!
~Dommy
omg
i was cracking up
it is nothing like the book
but so stupid its hilarious
Hey...
I wasn't offended at all, as I love a good joke, and I am a Twilight hater. The books are overrated. (:
This was hilarious and made me laugh a lot.
keep writing.
So is the Twilight series worth reading?
Do it! Do it! Do it! Oh, by the way, DO IT!
Anyway, I think I see a part three coming in my head...it's funny what vamp-pregnancies can inspire among children like me...
if you copied this and handed it out to all the Twilighters at my school they would shoot you. They are diehard twilight fans. I tried the read the books but after 200 pages of nothingness I put it down. Ill eventually read it just so i know what the movies about.
Anyway that part about my school is true they even create a dissease for it OCD (obsessive cullen disorder) I just love making fun of them. In fact this was so funny and good I may just show it to one of the hard core leaders of the group
Keep it up and with the hype your getting I would consider writing another one!!!
I've enjoyed Steph Meyer, but this was still amusing. =D
Although it needs to be LONGER! Gah. xD
That was really funny! Even though I am a fan of the books, I was cracking up almost the whole time I was reading this.
LOL I think its sooo funny!, but I find it a bit weird, but anyways I think it was kind of cool, especially edward not remembering bella's name, good job
Hee hee. I just love the fact that this pretty much mocks all of the people who post Twilight fanfiction. I, personally, think that (fanfic) is what kind of ruined Twilight. I still love the books, but I hate what they've become. Anywhoo, nice. And I love your username.
Holly
That was amazing XD I laugh at practically anything and everything so my opinion doesn't necessarily count but I was crying by the end. I adore Stephine Meyer's story but I really don't enjoy her writing style. I like how you made Edward so simple-minded and self centered. Alright, I think I'm done lau...*snigger* wait, never mind.
~Lupe
Erm...
I dunno. I don't think it was my brand of humor. I was able to appreciate it, and I sniggered at it, but I wouldn't say that I loved it. It might have been a better idea to stick a little bit more with the plot. But then again, this is Hollywood we are talking about. Since when as a book-made-movie ever turned out right?
I would say that my favorite part is actually the dumbing down of the titles for the movies, exclamation points and all. Definitely earned some chuckle points there.
Rock on to Stephenie Meyer (I think the books were a little overrated, but they were enjoyable) and Fangs!
*thumbs up*
~GryphonFledgling
ROFL, great. You should post this on ff.net if you have not already. I like Meyer but I'm able to take aj oke, and this was funny! I loved the part where Bella got shot and then Edward walks off laughing, lol. It was good.
I adore it. I dislike the Twilight series and I think it wa absolutely hilarious. I wouldn't call it a satire - I'd just call it a big joke. I love it. You hve a great sense of humour. :3 I think you drewout the 'colon' bit out just a little too much, but other than that, it was all hilarious.
Okay I love Twilight and Edward Cullen, and I also love Fangs now. People can say that Edward was made into a complete joke but I loved this. I was laughing so hard I started crying...you are a very comedic writer. I absolutely loved this.
Great
I love the books, but I have to admit this was funny! You got to make another one of these!
My thoughts exactly.
Although, as many people have already said, the gun thing got old. It would've been a lot funnier if Edward acted like himself. Like, he bites her on accident and she feels excruciating pain, then he scuks the venom out and he very nonchalantly says "sorry, love". And she's like "darn it"
XD XD XD
This was so hilarious! I loved it!
I haven't read Stephanie Meyer, but this was great...
Nice work!
Teh Wozzinator
(by the way... no edits!)
*GASP!* My, my, how could you do this..... *shakes head* so sad. Edward Cullen is my absolute dream guy and you made him a complete jerk! Although, this is very funny. I love Edward Cullen!
Jessie xx
Probibly the only funny thing i have read on did site, yaya you!
Ehhh....it was pretty funny I'll admit, and like everyone else I love Stephanie Meyer, but the gun thing just got old. I really think it would have been funnier if you mentioned it in the first couple of scenes maybe and then never mentioned it again except maybe in passing, like "Oh yeah, I shot that chick....oh well, whatevs". After awhile it was just like "Ok, you shot her, we get it." You could expand this more and make it all that much funnier.
Now on to read part two!
I'm a really big fan of the books but this is just so funny ^_^ I love it.
I have my 'wtf...?' expression right now. The words explain pretty much how I look like.
Err. Sort of immature, but it is sort of funny. In that idiotic way. I'm not prejudiced against you because of this.
Have you ever thought about emailing this to her? Stephenie Meyer, I mean.
--Seree.
B: He's an idiot!
C: With a gun. He's the last person I'd mess with.
B: You're the sheriff.
C: Without a gun! What do you think I am, stupid? <<I agree!>>
AHHHHHH! LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL! I FREAKIN LOVE THIS..for all those peeps who are all..OMG you ripped my soul out I can't belive you would do this or in the words of AyumiGosu17 "effin retarded" get a life it is just supposed to be funny..writing is supposed to be about what you want to say not what others think..so yeah btw she put TWO warnings about it and if you are that much of a Stephanie Meyer fan you wouldn't ahve read it or commented on it..that wasn't the point of this anyways back to what I was saying
OMG THAT WAS FREAKIN AWESOME..admittedly I do like the second one more but this was still ridiculously funny...I'm no fan of the books either..because I don't like the way Bella is most of the time..but I still read them..and I still think this was good..
You could add more to it.. like I don't know how to say it but like so we get the character's emmotions more..idk
Wow...that's all I have to say. Just.....wow.
Hey, either you like it or you don't, but in all fairness, I did put in two warnings for Stephenie Meyer fans. And hey, at least criticize while you put down (my soft spot's scratched!).
Ummm...okay, that was entirely stupid! Yeah, it's supposed to be humorous, but omg!! This is effin retarded! (*takes heart out of me* Ah, Stephanie! I'm sorry all of this happened!)
I don't get the joke for scene 1!! Can you explain it to me please, then I'll critique it!! from what I read I thought it was funny lol
LOL! I bow down to you for writing this. I've always hated this series with a passion and this was amazing. I was laughing so hard through most of it. Thanks for that. My day needed to be brightened.
I love the Twilight series, but I'm also a sucker for bad humor!
So, quite simply, I ADORED this! Really funny, short, and random. I just finished Eclipse (so much vampire drama) that it's refreshing to see something like this. And you know what I say to Bella? BWAHAHA, he shot you! Sorry, I just don't like Bella's drama that much. it's funny how Edward keeps getting her name wrong. And the pencil thing...
Oh, bravo. I thoroughly enjoyed this.
I am a huge fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight series, but I have to say that I thought your fanfic was hysterical.
Hahaha!! That part made me laugh so hard! I really enjoyed reading this. It's interesting to see Edward act so very...non-Edward-like.
Ok, I love Stephanie Meyer and worship the paper she writes on, but I won't lie; this was amusing.
There, pat on the back done.
It's pretyt hard to critique something that is entirely dialogue, but I'll try anyways.
The shooting? No. Even if you HAD to leave it in there (which you don't, it's uneeded violence), he definitely didn't need to shoot her 3 times. Also, since there is no descriptions, we are kinda suprised to realise he has a gun, maybe consider going back and adding the scene where she has just moved in with her dad and maybe he tells her about losing the gun, thus you can build up their relaitonship (her thinking he's stupid and all) so it doesn't suprise people later.
Other thing, after all random acts of violence, you kind of drop things. He shoots her...and leaves her there? He stabs her with a pencil...and what? She just ignores him? You leave alot of the scenes open, so we end up having to peice together what happens from the things they say later. Which maybe was your goal, but it is kind of distracting. Even a little "M: OMG Bella! You're bleeding! I'll call an ambulance as soon as I get my report to the teacher. Don't move!" would help close the scene off better and give it a finished feeling.
=P S'all I got.
Hehe, I found it amusing, as logn as I ignored the whole THIS IS FROM TWILIGHT thing...other than that, I loved it. I turned off my obsession...teehee.
~Bella~
Wow, that was funny- especially the charlie scene. The gun part is the only part I wasn't a real fan of, but then the part about Charlie and the gun was funny... so mixed emotions. Oh, and I liked the part where he apologized for the pencil incident- I literally lol'd
I'm going to move this to fanfiction...It should probably have been moved there long ago, haha. Oh well.
HAHAHAHAHA. I loved it. You kind of kill the name joke at the beginning though. You could cut out a lot of that and it would be funnier.
For example:
Haha. That was funny, especially the Charlie part. I love this series. You should keep writing scripts like this one! It was great! Kudos! (Laughs)
lol! That was hilarious. I also enjoyed the Charlie bit --the gun thing was quite funny but the name bit to me is not funny at all and it gets really repetitive. It'd be better to have Edward call Bella by a different name every time and have Bella correct him once or twice at the beginning and then just give up. To me, the whole "It's Bella!" thing every time just ruins the joke. But that's just my opinion.
Also, I just want to add to what Amelia said --A parody is generally an imitation about a work of literature done in a humorous way. Key word in this case is imitation. It's easy to mock a book by doing all this random stuff, but the trick is mocking the book and still have the characters be...in character. Edward to me is a little too trigger-happy to be Edward. Bella ---Nah, I think you got Bella pretty well ;D
Thank you very much for the praise (esp. you Sassy!). I know how hard it is to get comments like these, especially in comedies, but I'd really like some more critique on this. If I wanted a bunch of pats on the back, I wouldn't post it (since I have two hands, two pats will be enough, or four if I pat twice!). Only one person has really given feedback (which I greatly appreciate), but I'd like more. My defense: I know I'M not perfect, but with enough back-whipping, I can at least TRY to be...
Anyway, crit AND praise. That'd be nice.
*giggle/snort loudly and uncontrollably* Personally, i didn't really care for her books... Please don't shoot me!
I'm not critiquing this, because it entertains me too much. I loved Charlie. Nicely done. OH! That reminds me, I've got to give my friend "Eclipse" tomorrow...
I thought it was funny in general, but I also thought the parts about shooting were unnecessary as they didn't relate at all to the books. This whole thing was people getting other characters' names wrong. Which is funny, for the first scene, but became very tired after the second. But scene four was still funny since it was something different. Ex:
If it's meant as a "tribute" (however much... it deviates), I would try to stick to the storyline a little bit more. In place of the gun thing, for instance, I would maybe put something about one of the other Cullens biting her by accident maybe.
This reads like it should be satire, but it isn't quite there yet. It needs a few more elements from the original to poke fun at.
teeheehee. i worship that little fake script. hilarious! i've even read those books and i enjoy it greatly. YAY!
Haha, that was so...even reading it a second time there are no true words. Awesome job comrade!
I like Stephenie Meyer alot, but you gotta admit, that was pretty funny.
Thanks, but I doubt I'll be continuing, and to tell you the truth, I didn't think ANYONE was going to like this! Pretty much everyone likes Stephenie Meyer! Even guys!
Lol. I haven't read the books but I found this very very funny! lol I really liked it. I will be looking forward to reading the next ones! Hurry!
BBB
No...just no....way too lil kidish...and that reaks of spam....it hurt part of my soul (the part that lives and breathes Stephenie Meyer lor) like really bad. Shame on you!