Lauren2010

How old exactly is Shanna? I thought she was probably in her twenties or something. Does she still live in her parents house? It seems that way. Also, If she ...

Hey Tanya! I actually think I may have read the previous version? It sounded familiar. Anyways. I really liked this chapter. Riley has a very pronounced personality for an animal. ...

Go ahead and introduce me to Ben as well, I'd like to give him a nice punch to the face. Hah. I do really like though that they aren't treating ...

Hey Black Thought! Wow, you've really got something on your hands here. I liked this story a lot, though Conrad and I are two of a small group of YWSers ...

Hey TheNewHero. First off, let me point out that I'm not such a huge fan of prolgoues in general. So don't be put off by anything I might not say...nicely. ...

Aw this was cute. Overall an adorable story. I love the concept and I think that someday when you have time you should try expanding this into a longer story. ...

I really love your concept here. You certainly have an interesting and unique idea to this. In addition to what others have pointed out, I only have a few things... ...

Their eye's met since Their eye's met I feel like there is one to many "Their eye's met here. Also, it would just be eyes, no need for the apostrophe ...

Great chapter Emma! The only thing I was going to mention was Mr. Davis. If he was the passenger in the car, I don't understand why Amelia is referring to ...

Hey, nice chapter! I don't really have much to say about it. Just keep in mind showing not telling for here and future use. I hardly see any big stand-outish ...

Hey! Sorry I'm a bit late on this chapter, but I'm here now :D I enjoyed this chapter. A lot happened, a lot was explained. I only want to mention ...

Alright, your prologue. I think it has potential. Personally, I'm not one for prologues because most of the time they aren't necessary and they are quite difficult to write well. ...

Cute story :) I felt that this moved very fast, and didn't have a lot of meat to it. Slow things down, take time to explore the setting and the ...

Hey there, I'm Lauren and I'll be reviewing for you today. This was an interesting beginning, though I don't feel there was much to it. And I noticed several spelling ...

Hey there, I'm Lauren and I'll be reviewing for you today. I'll start with some nitpicks... Young Siblings slept peacefully in their beds, as siblings is not a formal title, ...