Lauren

Hi, Gahks. I must say, I thought this was particularly good. Somewhat short and snappy, but still powerful for what it is. A good character study, if that was the ...

Hi. Before I start, you should know that you have to critique at least twice before each story you submit. That's why you've not got many reviews. The dialogue, I ...

I think this has potential - a lot of potential. And that is because your MC, Lexi, sounds very real - I like how she described her feelings on friends, ...

Hello! I also thought this was pretty decent. The descriptions were illustrious... everything was analysed to its full potential... you have a way with words and a varied vocabulary. The ...

Hi again, Bittersweet. I think you've outdone yourself here. Normally, if it was an average storyline, I would complain that it was a bit 'this happened, that happened' but I ...

I thought this was a great read, casstic. I can see how the MC is unstable in her feelings for his man, how she can't make sense of them, and ...

Okay, so I have to agree with some of the others, that is was a bit... well, it wasn't exactly riveting. It was sweet but not particularly imaginative and, as ...

Yeah, I've read this. Confusion might be due to the fact that it's called 'A Northern Light' in America, and I think 'A Gathering Light' is a variarion used in ...

Hi. Can I just say, first of all, that this was absolutely beautiful, this story? It had all the right elements to it. and café’s Yeah... there shouldn't be an ...

Hi there! Will just skip straight to comments and corrections... The wind blew wildly, hitting the sides of the small hut where Brittany sat. Any other time she would have ...

Hi - I liked this; it was fun. Here are some things I saw that need correcting: Colin Everywhere else you've spelled it 'Collin'. of his desk OFF his desk. ...

Hi, Monki, nice to meet you! Now, to what I think: The opening paragraphs were really well-written. Very... analytical. And I'm sure many people can relate to it. It was ...

Just... lovely, lovely, lovely! The prose of so very poetic that I'm sure you should try your hand at transforming this into actual poetry. Your wording lingers, is not easily ...

Hi - corrections and comments are in bold. Snowflakes float down from the dark void that is the sky. They paint my cheeks and nose a cool wet sheer and ...

Hi. Nice to meet you. “Becca?” Mom calls. She appears in the doorway. Her honey - colored curls are brimming with gray and the crease lines on her face have ...