Katriona

Hello, Dullahan! I'm Katriona (clearly :-) ) and I'll be critiquing your work today. I'm a little out of practice, so... Bear with me? First off: Your premise is very ...

Hi, JeJeLiLi! I read whitewolfpuppy's review and your story, and I think I have some suggestions. First, you have a very interesting premise here. The idea of a girl who ...

Hello, PoetChan! This is a lovely poem, though I may be slightly biased, because your first line brings to mind a story that is precious to my heart. The entire ...

Hello, Candyman!      I agree with UpandOut15 that this was an intriguing piece. It makes me wonder what's been happening in the past eighteen years, what kind of world ...

This is a beautiful poem. It is frightening at times, yet makes me want to stand up and say, "I read the end of the story, and we win!" The ...

This is not a review-- it is just a comment on the point of your poem and the other comments. I am a Christian. I agree with your poem, mainly. ...

Everybody else seems to have covered what is wrong with it, so mostly I will tell you how (in my opinion) to make it better. First, I think you should ...

Hello, Kite1992. I really like your story. It is kind of short, but that's okay for a first chapter. Just as long as you add on to it! Most of ...

That was really good. It kept my attention until the very end, and now I want to read more! Your description and dialogue were very realistic, it made it seem ...

This is really good. You kept the story moving and the reader interested. I do think you might have been able to slow down a bit, so that the escape ...

Your updated version is much better than the other one. It catches the readers attention immediately, and makes it almost impossible to stop reading until the end. Good job! You ...

Hello xLogan, I have to say, this sounds like a really good beginning for a story. If you continue you it, I will most likely read it. MissMiaFacinelli did a ...

Hello CaitlinGrant, I really liked your story. I liked the normality of it in the beginning, and then the strangeness of it by the end of the chapter. It moved ...

Hello RSwriter3, I really liked your Poem, it captured the beauty of rain. I do not usually do poems, so the only thing I can help you with is the ...

I liked the story. It is because it happens to everybody that makes it so interesting. What makes your case so special is that you chose to write about it. ...