Jiggity

Hola, Suz! I didn't find any grammatical mistakes so kudos to you on that. It was fairly well written, but could be a little more engaging, I think. Maybe its ...

*Yawns tiredly* Herrow, I have just awoken! Nothin' better than reading your stuff in the morning, let me tell ya ^_^ He leans [s]there[/s] up against his car with his ...

Heya, biznatch. I'm here, finally! I'll say, from the outset, that I think this is way overwritten. Some nights I [s]would[/s] try to imagine the most fantastic of creatures lurking ...

Yeppers, I'm in agreement with McChimpy. This was great. There was something aside from "inbetween" though: It is colder now that it has ever been; stale, lukewarm, than it has ...

On a general note, before I begin, cast lists generally include a brief description of the characters. Tobias: May I join you? Jainy: I suppose. Tobias: (TOBIAS lifts himself out ...

The horses watch him with cricketeyes and curiosity and he walks among them thin and black in the dark , a nymph,. period, comma mash-up. he makes her trap the ...

Hola! I thought the first stanza was great. ^_^ As the crew crawled over the beach towards the fruit, they lost their strength, and they looked at eachother. Countless days ...

Well, this was boring. I mean, really boring - not only in imagery but in the sentence variety and execution as well. The lack of proper punctuation should be addressed ...

Yeah, I gotta agree with Vox. I didn't get this. Not because it was so good, but rather because there was no real point to it. Having said that, the ...

All Creep knew to do was to deal with this problem in a familiar way. Awkwardly worded. 'Creep only knew one way to deal with a problem" - or something ...

Hey, don't think I've seen you around before. Welcome to YWS. I'm going to keep this general, because for the most part, there aren't too many grammatical nitpicks to make ...

Somehow, these seemed to improve with each piece, which is obviously to the good. But it makes me seem shoddy! Leaves me with so little to say. Having said that, ...

Lol, these are short enough to be merged together, you know. Some of them, anyway. This is how she looked as I opened the door [s]to her[/s]: ‘You don’t sound ...

There was only a dozen of us, all told, and the music we played was kept within moderate levels. for some reason, the use of 'was' confounded me here. I ...

and could still feel residue boredom rattling around inside me No problem with rattling, but I would say 'residual' quite possible in the form of projectile vomit, actually. possibly My ...