Jiggity

Hey, SH, just a few quick things: The stars [s]beaming[/s] across the wide window of her spacecraft resurrected her memories of the accident. Reads better without that. Or if you'd ...

Inky! Aloha. Creeping under the door is a straggling shadow, a keep safe of my memories... I heard nothing at first but as I recovered from a vulnerable sleep, my ...

Hey there, Prok. Way to use 'then' :P So not going there, ha. It was a curious stroke of irony when my life was worth living only when I was ...

Well, it was certainly intriguing. But vague. vanishing into the hellfire of their own fury you used hellfire only a line before this, try and think of something else. Honestly, ...

Hm. I quite liked the idea of this piece but I thought the execution was lacking and could have been done better. You repeat 'canon of life' at the end ...

What was the point of this? It made no sense and was repetitive in the extreme. Saying the same thing three ways in three lines isn't exactly creative, its annoying ...

Hey there, Evanrith. I found this be fairly boring and pointless. The flow was halting at times and poorly managed. I also found the repetition of 'streams' to be my ...

Hey, I agree with Nate this was a fun, light read. I don't really have any problems with it honestly, aside from that minor contradiction Nate pointed out. If you’d, ...

I'm going to keep this general, rather than techno-specific (by which I mean, nitpicky). I really didn't like this chapter; I loved the concept of a dream, loved the potential ...

but he know that people have experienced worse knows The hills are milkwhite in the New York fog – breasts. I think you should either get rid of the breast ...

It is not just black and white notes. It is not just a sound ranging from beauty to trash. It is a whole different language. Billy’s sister said that so ...

LONELILY Not a word. 'Lonely' or 'Lonesomely' will do. And I wish that I were fifteen again was The class starts to steam inside in a consistent blur of colors ...

Well, Joseph pretty much covered everything. He's right, though, about 'then' - you use it way too often in this chapter. Mostly, I didn't mind though, just because I'm so ...

She tried to scrub her upper arms [s]with her hands[/s] without waking but it didn’t work. You make it extremely hard to critique, you know, XD. Too damn good, aye. ...

Hello, BC! Don't know why this didn't get any reviews; it's a fantastic piece. The only thing, grammatically that I'll point out straight away is that, at times, your sentences ...