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Re: Soul Eater
I like this poem. I really do. I have a few nitpicks to address, but other than that, I want to say I do like this poem. First of all, ...
Apr 21, 2015 -
Re: Separation (Farewell)
Review time! Hello! First impression: This was a good story, but it was hampered by small grammar mistakes and a few other issues. Nitpicks: I'll start from the top. I ...
Mar 1, 2015 -
Re: The Rose
Hello there. This is my first review in months. I'm revising my review structure. Let's see how this goes. First impressions: I read this twice. My initial thought is that ...
Mar 1, 2015 -
Re: Adonia, Beloved - Chapter One *rewritten*
Discussion I'll go through bit by bit talking about it. One of the first things I noticed is the spaces, which detracted from my ability to fully absorb your writing. ...
Oct 4, 2014 -
Re: Diamond Rose with Loads of Screentone
I think that the textures serve to be an interest contrast, and I enjoy overall detail you put in many different aspects of this piece. One of my only nitpicks ...
Oct 4, 2014 -
Re: They just wont fall.
My main nitpicks are: -Capitalization of i -Apostrophes (she's) versus (shes) Other than that, I liked the use of language to portray emotion and overall I find this to be ...
Oct 4, 2014 -
Re: "Broken" Prologue
Hello there. Nitpicks and Changes: Then by a twist of fate, we were assigned to do a school work together. Locked inside four walls with no company but each other, ...
Oct 4, 2014 -
Re: d
Time for a review again after a brief hiatus in reviewing activity. First, I will start with nitpicks/suggestions: So, first day of school was here. I ran my fingers across ...
Oct 4, 2014 -
Re: Chapter one: A Human (Flash fiction)
Nitpicks and corrections: My name is Terry Nolsten. I have been a slave most of my life. Untill he came, that is. Shin Ak. The savior, the Legend. "I had ...
Aug 19, 2014 -
Re: Wordsmithing: A Response to Grammar
I have to say, I truly agree with most of this. The one thing that really stuck with me is this: And they forget, or are willingly ignorant or even ...
May 26, 2014 -
Re: Yesterday - Where's my light? (Pending title)
Why, hello there. Jared here with a review. First up, nitpicks So [,] she shouldn’t really be surprised when she tripped on her own shoe lace and stumbled down the ...
May 26, 2014 -
Re: The Veil - Chapter 8
Alright. This is likely my last review on Review Day. I'm going to make it good. First, nitpicks. They seemed to overlook her [,] which was fine. See comma. Mostly ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Boundless
This is definitely an interesting poem. I thought you did a very nice job putting a lot of meaning into a very short poem. There are those that exist that ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: The Road To My Heart. Chapter #1
Hello there. It's Jared, with another review. First, nitpicks: Before I start on your first paragraph, you should know: It's cluttered. That's the best way to put it. You're putting ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: The Road To My Heart. Chapter #1
I'm going to add more on this, actually (I accidentally made a second review, I might as well fill it up properly). I'll start with the fact that this shouldn't ...
May 25, 2014
