Griffinkeeper

The question: is it worth revisiting? Overview: A man falsely accused of murder is given a choice: die in prison or travel through the dangerous Kerr Hole (Which is really ...

I read the poem. Here is my critique. "From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise because of your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger." ...

This story lacks structure. Here is a helpful way to organize your story. Once you have more experience, you can experiment with it. So, whenever you start writing, this is ...

Some sentences that bothered me: The poor lighting gave the vehicle a gloomy feeling, one that Leo didn’t necessarily agree with. He was alive, and the soldiers had said they’d ...

I just couldn't slug it out. In the beginning, with all the parental nagging, you focused on the nagging. Why? Usually when movies or books have nagging, they use the ...

Oh my god! Griffiny Awesomeness! *Stars* The first paragraph was awesome. Just plain awesome. Then there were the other characters. They spent way too much time talking, then you went ...

After a few moments in the middle of the brawl, Xylon was knocked back. So far back, that he fell against the steaming rock. Meanwhile, the crack had grown larger, ...

The Disease Light and Dark A misconception of the world. What's evil is dark, what's light is good. The truth is not always as simple as it seams. Complicating situations, ...

The first thing I would like to do is welcome you YWS. We have some very promising authors on this site. Many of them have improved due in part to ...

Don't forget the two to one ratio for reviews to postings. Welcome to YWS! This story does have some problems and my gut says that it is a planning thing. ...

Wrote this just now, had to post it before I go to sleep. A beautiful thing happened this night— the storm clouds moved in. Gradually they cradled the city, hovering ...

The idea could be funny, but there are a few things missing. First, we're missing a conflict. So these people are in hell. So what? Are they trying to escape ...

Um... no. This story sounds like a vampire conspiracy theory. Saying that Vampires made Hitler would break any plausibility the story would have and you would lose the readers in ...

I'll be honest, I only read the first paragraph. The sun was dipping low into the sky, barely a sliver visible. It threw deep oranges, bright reds into the sky, ...

Several things strike me as being odd about this. For one, it is set in the future, yet things seem written for a person in the past. When people write ...