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Re: This Pen is Retired
This pen writes no longer, It has abandoned its trade; It has gone on vacation, And let its ink fade. Important point to note here: If the pen went on ...
Feb 27, 2009 -
Re: Remaining In The Past
Remaining In The Past I stand in the dark So alone So silent Why and how? I grieve in my despair So painful So quiet Why and how? I cling ...
Feb 26, 2009 -
Re: I'm waiting...
I'm waiting... I'm waiting... I'm... Waiting for you to tell me something- anything. Anything to dispel this, malaise. I only saw half an idea in the entire stanza. There's a ...
Feb 26, 2009 -
Re: It's Breaking Me
Memories flash through my head in a blur While hurt fills my broken heart Tears stream down my forlorn face And depression is slowly wearing my body down With the ...
Feb 26, 2009 -
Re: Feeding Time
Good morning, sunshine I’m feeling warm today and I think It’s got something to do with the Subtle glow of the faint words Which rest on the translucent screen Interesting ...
Feb 24, 2009 -
Re: The End (or Scenes from Armageddon)
It's times like these when I struggle with my recent vow not to be overtly harsh. Don't listen to this darkodemark character, he's clearly basing his judgment on middle-school characterizations ...
Feb 24, 2009 -
Re: Fading Star
Oh how bright your smile! You’ll be with us For just a little while We love you dear And as you fade out, Please, honey, just don’t fear! After calling ...
Feb 22, 2009 -
Re: Single Tear
The form of pure torture, is sliding down my cheek. It is the only thing that I can recognize, from the last few weeks. The beginning is like looking at ...
Feb 20, 2009 -
Re: Feeling Yourself Fall
The cold hits you, Like a wall. The way you describe the cold makes it seem like the wall is hitting you, which is confusing and unrealistic; you hit walls, ...
Feb 19, 2009 -
Re: Times
[b]Its these times I cherish. In fact, every single moment of them. How can you have a moment of a time? That does not make sense, and as such, I ...
Feb 19, 2009 -
Re: My Room
My walls are covered in all kinds of things. Old locks, magazine cut-outs, pictures, posters... Pictures of me in a roller coster! Last line is forced because you're trying to ...
Feb 19, 2009 -
Re: Your Getaway Car for Real Feelings
friendships; whispers of feelings, obvious, yet left unsaid. Only slurred between closed jaws . The remnants of a night infuse your subconscious with questions. Minutes preserved like time capsules in
Feb 19, 2009 -
Re: The Comedian
At last comes the comedian Lover’s pal and cynic’s friend If you're going to use words like "At last", you'd better back them up elsewhere in the piece. After giving ...
Feb 19, 2009 -
Re: Like a Child
This poem gave the reader absolutely nothing that he didn't already know. Basically, it could have been summed up in a line or two, because inside the skeleton of the ...
Jan 11, 2009 -
Re: It Hurts
This poem hurts. It's typical teenage nonsense with the customary cutting and absolutely no poetic quality, which is why I am mystified as to why you see this as a ...
Jan 11, 2009
