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Re: Chapter 1-Chapter 3
Hello, EvangelineFire here for a review on behalf of Team Pencils and Swords! :D Here we go. To start, I want to say that this is all over the place. ...
Jan 29, 2017 -
Re: Knowing Gods Chapter 2 (Third draft)
Hello, EvangelineFire here on behalf of Team Pencils and Swords! :D I should warn you that I haven't read any of the chapters before this, so take everything I say ...
Jan 29, 2017 -
Re: An account of isolation (part one of two)
Hello, EvangelineFire here to review your work. :D 1) The first thing I want to mention is the description of Jim in the beginning. It's way too long and much ...
Jan 29, 2017 -
Re: Voices of the Ice: Chapter 1 *DEPRECATED*
Hello! I'm EvangelineFire and I'm here to review your chapter. :D Hopefully this helps you out a little bit. Before I begin I just want to mention how well written ...
Jan 26, 2017 -
Re: Axylia [Chapter 01]
Hello, there! :D I'm EvangelineFire, here to review your work and also welcome you to YWS. You're going to love it here. ;) Okay, so, this was a good chapter. ...
Jan 1, 2017 -
Re: Ashura: A World of Sword and Magic Chapter 2
Here I am again and this is going to be a pretty short review. :) Let's jump right in. Last chapter there was a fight scene, but because it was ...
Dec 29, 2016 -
Re: Ashura: A World of Sword and Magic Chapter 1
Well, I finally make it over here for Review Day. :D Before I start, I just want to say that I like the setting of this, I really do, but ...
Dec 29, 2016 -
Re: The Birth of a Phoenix - Chapter One
Hello, there! :D Before we begin, I just want to mention a coupe minor corrections. "the water hit the golden sandy shore." I think you should remove the word 'sandy'. ...
Dec 16, 2016 -
Re: Ashura: A World of Sword and Magic Prologue
Hello, there! :D Before I begin, I want to ask where this story takes place. You have it marked as fantasy and it definitely has a fantasy feel to it, ...
Dec 15, 2016 -
Re: Bus Trip (Edited)
Wow, just wow. This was absolutely incredible. I honestly don't have one bad thing to say about it. But before I do anything else, here are some minor things I ...
Dec 14, 2016 -
Re: Chapter I
Hello, there! :D A lot of your sentences are sounding really awkward and forced. One of the main reasons for this is that they are too complicated and long. To ...
Dec 14, 2016 -
Re: Scylla
Okay, so I honestly don't know what to think about this piece. It's short, to the point, and reads fast. But first I want to ask... how do you pronounce ...
Dec 13, 2016 -
Re: Homosexuality Based On the Way Our Country Was Founded With a Biblical Perspective
I really enjoyed this article and I'm glad people are coming to accept homosexuals, and not just because I think I may be one too (I'm still on the rocks ...
Dec 13, 2016