Church

it does need lenght and detail, but the last line did make me laugh. I liked it. I have never had a drink oin my entire life so I really ...

I think instead of A's you should put Ace. It sounds like it would fit a bit better. There also needs to be some basic punctuation. I liked the Romeo ...

I loved the story. Post nuclear war germany and the diease taht follows. I liked how you described the peace to be worse than the war itself and that you ...

It was short and highlty descriptive. I like how you make it easy for the reader to visualize the characters, thier actions, and the setting they were in. The kiss ...

I love war stories and tragedies. I love tragic war stories the most. This reminded me of Blackhawk Down. Very well writen and the need for revenge at the end ...

The only thing you need is a name to go with the storyline. Like usual I can't find any grammer errorrs or punctuation so I'm not much help there sorry. ...

I can't crit grammitcally in poetry so I am not going to try. I take it this survivor did indeed kill himself because of guilt. I think there are to ...

I know I said I never would, that one soldier I the family was enough, but as soon as I did it, I felt closer to you. the fourth "I" ...

ok I need to Know, Is she a jedi knight or a padawan or a master even considering the lightsaber thing. If she isnt then you may have a problem ...

my biggest complaint..well not complaint iissue at most...was the font style if you did it in notepad and do want to change it dont worry it can be done but ...

It was pretty good, but follows no real parts of the Halo story line and it seamed like you scrunched it all together, like you had five mins to put ...